I’ve never been suicidal but have certainly acted suicidal. It’s part of my disease. It’s kinda ridiculous when I break it down. My thought process is somewhat funny to me. I think to myself, I have wayyy to much to offer in this lifetime and so much to do so how can I even imagine offing myself? I can’t. My manic inflated self esteem that...
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August 1, 2012
I just cancelled my appointment with my psychiatrist this week cause I just don’t feel like it. But I never feel like it, for the most part dread it, and the sad thing is after it’s done I feel great. Well, most of the time. To be honest, I haven’t always been that honest with my shrink which I know is bad and defeats the purpose but there are...
July 5, 2012
On April 14th 2011, Catherine Zeta Jones came out to the world thatshe suffered from Bipolar II Disorder. Merely a year later, on June15, 2012, Jones made an appearance on ABC’s The View and Joy Beharinquired about her experience of Bipolar Disorder. Zeta brieflyresponded to the query then moved onto promoting her upcoming film.Now here we have a...
July 5, 2012
Insomnia….oh that blasted, dreaded word but there you have it what’s keeping others, like me, awake at night. So what is insomnia, what does it mean exactly? In layman’s terms…. You can’t sleep. More officially it means….the difficulty initiating or maintaining sleep, associated with impairments of daytime functioning. Although it can occur at any...
June 18, 2012
I was the first of my friends to decide to start a family. I was only 22, and most people in my social circle were a long way from settling down, let alone having a baby. They tried to be supportive during the pregnancy and in the early days of parenthood, but I could tell they didn’t really get why caring for my newborn son left me so exhausted...
June 13, 2012
I have horrible taste in men, and it’s really getting old. I’m not gonna lie. I spent most of my twenties in a sudo manic high so lost a lot of years trying to find true love. I managed to scare off most of the men in New York and Los Angeles with my intensity which left me perpetually alone. By my late twenties all my girlfriends were either...
June 11, 2012
Are side effects getting you down? Almost every medication out there comes with some sort of side effect. As people with mental illness we take our share of medication on a routine basis so we are very well aware of all the different changes that can occur. With each new medication it seems comes a new array of possible side effects and we as...
May 29, 2012
It starts with a feeling of restlessness. I can’t sit still in one place too long. I try to listen to music. Read. Surf the Internet. Nothing catches my interest. The restlessness grows.Am I hungry?Am I thirsty?I try satiating both. Nothing helps.Now, I’m getting nervous, my heart beats faster. My eyes blink more, darting from here to there,...
May 21, 2012
To Be or Not To Be....THAT is the Question.......This year, I had several friends celebrating Mother's Day for the very first time with their newborns. I was so happy and excited for them; starting a family and moving into the next phase of their life. However, I couldn't help but be a little sad because I am not at that point in my life yet....
May 16, 2012
They come in threes.1. I spun out over Time Magazine’s controversial article Are You Mom Enough? extolling the virtues of attachment parenting, AKA, baby-centered parenting, which includes breastfeeding well into toddler years, co-sleeping and a strong distain for sleep training.2. I read about Aimee Ziegler’s death due to postpartum psychosis.3....
May 14, 2012
I am one of those people who feels the need to make a difference. I hate to stand by and see others suffer. So it's no surprise that I tend to be drawn to the kind of jobs known as "the helping professions." Over the last 15 years, as well as bringing up two children, I’ve worked in a variety of helping roles. I’ve volunteered at my local Women’s...
May 11, 2012
In the words of Sheryl Crow, I can’t cry anymore. At least, not for now. Please. I’m exhausted. Crying is draining, although it feels strangely good at the same time. Some of it has to do with “being a girl,” but more of it has to do with other stuff – medication stuff – which I hope gets resolved quickly, as I went to the doctor today and...