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poetry

A Hospitalization in Three Acts

Act I Inpatient

No time passes slower

than the minutes that creep into hours 

during a hospital intake.

All the questions! The re-questioning! The inquisition!

Where do you fall between 1 and 10?

You weigh your answer like a miser weighs his gold-

(with the utmost interest…)

for 3 to 1 will get you 1 to 1 

and no one wants 1 to 1.

The hospital is a dreary place.

The only brightness within is the staff,

who carries your light for you

Phoenix

We thought we were lost to the fire.

Leaving behind in the wake of our illness- debris:

a tangled mess of lost relationships, hope, and dreams.

Then, we began to talk,

speaking to each other quietly.

Although, they had told us not to,

because “good friends are not to be found in institutions, hospital wards or at day treatment centers”.

BUT, we broke the rules,

Embracing the Unknown, While Keeping my Smile

   I have loved writing, for as long as I can remember. I have written during many of my happiest moments in my life and of course during some of the toughest times as well. Within just the last couple of weeks, my husband’s and my world turned upside down. I’ve been stable for so long, and yet what we are presently going through has tested me and has tried to push me to my limit. 

Silent Madness

  This poem I wrote about bipolar. I wrote it to express how I felt years ago when my bipolar was at its worst. I hope this poem inspires you and speaks to the core of which you are, I know there are many who can relate. There is always Hope~

 

                                                              “   Silent Madness”

     I sat in my room in complete silence, not a word was heard. I was alone in my own tangled thoughts.

Keep On Trying

Ten years ago a dear friend of mine gave me a little book during my very first hospital stay called Keep on Trying which is centered around a kitten. I have been reminded of that book in many different ways over the last year through two dear friends. It has inspired me to collect together what I have learned and received through their never-ending love and support to write my own Keep on Trying Poem in hopes to share what they have given me.

I know it always seems like it’s raining,
But,
Keep on trying because there will be days you see the sun shining through.

My Wish for You

My wish for you today and every day after is

To know your true worth

To value yourself

To treat yourself like you do others

To be kind and gentle with yourself because you know you deserve it

To feel peace from your inner pain

To know how strong you truly are

To understand unconditional love

To understand your faith

To know courage

To believe you are strong, smart, beautiful, special, and kind

To continue even when you feel you have nothing left

To not be afraid of death nor life

Conquest

In a week, I will begin my last semester as an undergraduate student.

I am taking my last three classes to graduate with bachelors in chemistry.

A degree that not only help me further my dreams of becoming a doctor, but the thoughts that I’ve conquered something.

I have accomplished something.

I have finished college.

I have finished college and manage my bipolar disorder.

I have succeeded.

Not academically, but emotionally.

I am stronger than ever before and I’m ready.

I’m ready to take this to the next step.

My Letter to You

Some of us are so far from what we imagined our lives would be like;
Some have exactly what they pictured;
Some are trying to do everything they can to escape the constant reminder that we failed to meet our childhood expectations and dreams of adulthood.
No matter where we are all human where some things are within our control and others are not.
Above all, no thing or person is ever completely as it seems.

Winter Soul

Dedicated to the winters of my soul - because hibernation is as much a part of life as hyper-nation :)

I used to fear the crash
Now I know it can be more like a deeper dive

See different things
Or see things differently
Feel differently
Or feel nothing at all

Just because I sometimes don't feel
Does not mean I am not real