I had been expecting the call. Finally, two and a half weeks ago it came. Not that I wanted it to come, but it didn't surprise me. Over the last couple years, I've expected it. And dreaded it too.When I first heard the news, I was remarkably calm. All business. What needs to be done? What are the steps we take now? Who do we call? What happens...
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February 20, 2013
Although I put family and my beloved spouse in a different place, I was just thinking of all my varied friendships so I thought I would comment on them and show how a bipolar lifestyle works in:Being a good Catholic boy, serving on the altar until eighteen, I looked on nuns and priests as authority figures and was happy to see them on the friendly...
February 19, 2013
This issue is close to heart. Mental illness/Bipolar vs. pregnancy. To conceive or not conceive? The odds of having a child also with a mental illness? What are the medication risks? Because of so many facts that go into these issues, and I could write for days, I have limited this more to the mental and basic decision-making aspects, and have...
December 17, 2012
On Motherhood"You're a really good mother. Your son is very lucky to have such an attentive mom."These words were said to me yesterday by a pediatrician. Because I've been sick for most of my son's life, I feel insecure about the mother that I am most of the time so I had a hard time believing that these words were meant for me.She repeated...
November 5, 2012
"Don't you dare, for one second, surround yourself with people who are not aware of the greatness that you are."- Jo Blackwell-PrestonI knew there was a problem when this quote made me cry.. . .My friends and family knew I was bipolar. They knew I'd need help when I got pregnant. I warned them, but many of them had never experienced me sick and...
August 13, 2012
Last Tuesday, I was telling my friend Anna that generally speaking, I am quite self-aware when it comes to my bipolar moods. I have never been able to understand it when people say things like, “I was depressed, but I didn’t even know it”, because I am so acutely aware of my descents into low mood. I have tried my best with mood monitoring systems...
June 25, 2012
I saw a new psychiatrist recently. He is wonderful. Also, I’ve been officially diagnosed as bipolar II. I suspected as much, but never had specific confirmation. I’ve been feeling much better on my new medication, so I have hope. There are still a few side effects, though, so we’ll see if this is what will work long-term.I’ve started a bipolar/...
June 5, 2012
‘People are strange, when you’re a stranger.Faces look ugly, when you’re alone...’So sang Jim Morrison in 1967 in his song about drug abuse and paranoia. Now, although the song is about paranoia and I have suffered seriously with it eight years ago that is not what this blog is about – maybe I’ll address the issue of paranoia some other time. For...
May 16, 2012
They come in threes.1. I spun out over Time Magazine’s controversial article Are You Mom Enough? extolling the virtues of attachment parenting, AKA, baby-centered parenting, which includes breastfeeding well into toddler years, co-sleeping and a strong distain for sleep training.2. I read about Aimee Ziegler’s death due to postpartum psychosis.3....
May 8, 2012
Patience means...Not the ability to wait but the ability to keep a good attitude while waitingI read this recently...and here are some thoughts I have on what I am waiting for...I read this recently...and here are some thoughts I have on what I am waiting for...1. I am waiting to start my phd at the Uni of queensland in jul. I have very generous...
February 22, 2012
Getting any psychiatric diagnosis inevitably leads to a lot of questions. Once someone has been given a clinical label, it’s not surprising that they begin to wonder: why do I have this disorder? What’s the prognosis? What are the treatment options? What will my family and friends think? What does this mean for my work like? But getting diagnosed...
January 17, 2012
To be clear, I don’t agree with the victim mentality and it’s not my standard default. When I blame others for my troubles, I’m not taking responsibility for my life and my choices. I always look for my part in any negative, or what I perceive as a negative, experience. I'm very rarely a victim. Unless I'm blindsided or assaulted in my adult life...