Author: Birdie Thorn
When we are young, we want to be things like doctors, astronauts, and firemen. We picture the day when we will become an adult and live out those dreams. When we are young, we can’t grasp the amount of work, time, and sacrifice that will go into making those dreams come alive.
Some of us must work even harder given our home life situation. I was one of those kids. I grew up in a family that had very little money and many of my family members were alcoholics or recovering alcoholics. My parents were high school dropouts and got pregnant with me when they were only 18 years old.
Since I didn’t have a lot of stability at home, it had a negative impact on my school performance. I was also undiagnosed at the time with ADHD which didn’t help. I was a student who got C’s and D’s for grades. The only thing I ever enjoyed in school was writing. I was great at telling a story but struggled tremendously with grammar and punctuation.
While in school, I remember my friends telling me what they wanted to go to college for. I remember not really engaging in the conversation because I didn’t think college was something I would ever be able to do. I was poor and a below average student. How would I go to college?
I eventually graduated high school with a 2.0 gpa. I had no idea what I was going to do with my life. Before I could decide on my next step, I ended up getting pregnant right out of high school. I knew now that the odds of success were even further away from me. I was 18 and pregnant in the middle of the 2008 recession. No higher education and no real job experience. My boyfriend, now husband, decided to join the military to give us the best chance at a good life.
It was at this time that I decided I was going to do everything in my power to give my child a better life than I had. I wanted to make something of myself. I wanted to do things that made me proud. Shortly after we were stationed at an Air Force base, I enrolled in college. College did not come without its challenges. I was finally diagnosed with ADHD. It took me 4 years to get a 2 year degree.
Shortly after college I was diagnosed with Bipolar 2 disorder and Generalized anxiety disorder. These diagnosis’ felt so defeating. I had only ever heard of bipolar from movies that portrayed people with it as humans that couldn’t be successful in things like marriage, being a parent, and careers. I already felt like all odds were against me prior to my diagnosis, but I really started to feel it then.
I sat there in the office of my therapist and pictured all scenarios of my future and how this was going to effect it. Bipolar came with highs and lows and in between. I have bipolar 2 and was experiencing a depressive episode at the time. I couldn’t image how I was supposed to have a career if it felt impossible to even make it to this doctor’s appointment.
I spent many years believing the stigmas associated to bipolar. What I didn’t realize for a long time was that bipolar was not a death sentence to my future. In fact, bipolar comes with its own set of benefits. One of those benefits is what has gotten me to where I am today. That benefit is creativity. I could use the creativity that came with my very active bipolar brain and make a career out of it.
I decided that the only person that could determine how successful I would be was myself. Today I can say that despite all the things that were working against me, I am successful. I never gave up. I used the worlds doubts as fuel to get to where I wanted to be. I am a wife and have been with my husband for 18 years. I am a mother of two beautiful kids. I am a published author and recently published my first book titled, I Am Her, She Is Me. I am a mental health advocate and a speaker for the National Alliance for Mental Illness.
Success didn’t come easy for me. I had to work hard at it. I had to continue to fight stigmas associated with being poor, coming from teen parents, being a teen parent myself, and having mental health conditions. Anyone can be successful if you believe in yourself and don’t give up. Fight back and you will come out on top.
