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A New Belief System

Author: Melinda Goedeke I remember when my daughter was 22, and she started talking about wanting children some day.  This was cause for celebration as Laura often didn’t believe she had a future; her bipolar disorder caused her to live fast, talk fast and...

Honoring Her Illness

Author: Melinda Goedeke Destigmatize: to remove association from shame or disgrace  (according to Miriam Webster). I like destigmatizing; it feels honorable and worthwhile. And it is. I destigmatize all over the place often with tears streaming down my face as I...

Sure, I’m Okay

Author: Melinda Goedeke Recently, I went on an incredible rafting trip down the Colorado River in Moab, Utah. If I fell out of the raft, I was told to put my hand on my head signaling I was okay.  The guide said that okay meant I was alive.  I might be bleeding,...

The Time is Now

Author: Melinda Goedeke Every time I drive home, I have to decide exactly when to turn onto my street as that split second decision could be the difference between making it safely home or not.   My timing has to be perfect. I am sometimes forced (in my mind)  to cut...

Eternal Sleep 

Author: Melinda Goedeke  Sleeping is an event for me. 8:30 p.m. comes around, and I start thinking about sleep. I put on my oversized jammies and crawl into bed ready…..ready to shut down. To stop. To rest. My husband doesn’t do any “readying” and is asleep the moment...

She Would Want Us to Talk

Author: Melinda Goedeke Enraptured in a riveting discussion about The Crucible in my junior lit. class, I vaguely hear a threatening buzzing. And then I spot it – a killer bee swiftly flying around the room darting over heads and under desks, coyly, without...

Crystal Clear

Author: Melinda Goedeke Contingency plans rule my world because I see the glass as half empty. My kids used to sarcastically call me the beam of optimism because I was always preparing for the impending disaster. It’s one of those special gifts I learned in...

A Mother’s Marathon

Author: Melinda Goedeke I remember when Laura was little staring at me with a mix of defiance, confidence and spunk refusing to walk without her doll stroller. She was 16 months old and could most definitely walk. She knew walking solo meant moving to the “big kid...

The Power of Just

Author: Melinda Goedeke When my beautiful daughter was 23,  she was asked to be in one of her best friend’s wedding. Running towards me with her infectious smile, she shared the news with me talking so quickly I barely understood. What I did understand is that she was...

A Rainbow of Hope

Author: Melinda Goedeke I remember this moment in time clearly – standing in my office holding my friend Pat’s hand listening as her words tumbled awkwardly yet resolutely out of her mouth and tears quietly cascaded  down her cheeks. “Now, I don’t even have...

We are All on the Ride

Author: Melinda Goedeke Chaos is what I know; it is where I excel.  Keeping on the move ironically slows my racing thoughts and brings a loud silence to my brain.  Right now it seems chaos is the norm for many amidst this unpredictable pandemic that is careening down...

Pause. Just Pause.

Author: Melinda Goedeke As the sun sets and the red hues slowly drip into the lake, I pause and watch.  Peace washes over me as I breathe slowly noting the sound of my breath.  It is a stark contrast to the rapid, somewhat panicked breathing I know all too well. The...
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