Author: Tom Luker

I used to find joy in the cracks of the world,
In shadows that danced, in leaves as they twirled. A puddle was poetry, rain sang in rhyme,
Each moment a treasure, unmeasured by time. Back then, the wind whispered secrets to me,
The stars told me stories, the grass held my dreams. Happiness hummed in the hum of the bees,
And sadness was soft, like a lull in the breeze. But now I am ruled by four little pills,
Each one a tether, a chain to my will. They tell me I’m better, they promise me peace,
Yet steal all the colours I once held with ease. My mind was a storm-wild, untamed, and bright,
A flickering fire that burned through the night.
But fire consumes, and storms take their toll,
Now I am tired, too heavy, too cold. The highs were like heaven, a radiant sun,
Spilling with laughter, untamed and undone.
But the lows carved me hollow, swallowed me whole,
A pit with no bottom, a debt on my soul. I used to be weightless, but also so full,
Now everything’s distant-detached, mechanical. The stress wraps around me, a tightening thread,
Each thought is a battle that lives in my head. They say this is balance, this dull, muted air,
But I miss the madness, I miss even despair. For even in sorrow, I knew I was real,
Now, I am vacant—too hollow to feel.
Is sanity worth it, this alternate place,
Where nothing is sharp, yet nothing has grace? I swallow the cure and drift further away,
A stranger to life just waiting to stay.

You can find more from Tom on his Instagram @thomas.lukerr!