Ana

Something I am proud of:

20 years ago I had a manic episode that landed me in the hospital. The doctors diagnosed me for the first time with bipolar I disorder.

I remember sitting in my hospital bed, still in shock. Then I felt denial while ruminating in my head “This can’t be happening to me.” Followed by anger while yelling in my pillow “Why me!?!?

I had a longing for a romantic relationship but I was afraid no man would ever love me because I felt broken and defective, and the stigma around mental illness.

I was also afraid about my future. My mother was diagnosed with bipolar disorder before I was born and I’ve been watching her struggle all my life.

While I was still feeling the side effects from the antipsychotic medication, the brain fog, the numbness and heaviness in my body, I knew I had to do something because I didn’t want to spend the rest of my life living like that.

I was 32 years old and I had a longing for a relationship. But I was afraid no man would ever love me because of the stigma. I felt broken, defective and a walking red flag.

So I embarked on a healing journey for the last 20 years.

What I am most proud of is:

1) Learning to love myself, all the parts of myself, especially the parts that I judged as “embarassing” like the times when I was manic, the parts I hated when I was depressed, and the parts I rejected like having to take medication.

2) Meeting a great man who supports me, accepts me and loves me for who I am, despite my diagnosis.
We’ve been together for over 8.5 years and married. Our relationship has taught me that love is medicine, love is healing.
Meeting my husband was possible because I did my inner-work, healed my fears and shifted old relationship patterns.

3) Finding my life’s purpose and living it daily.
Before being diagnosed, I had a successful career, was financially independent, had a great group of friends but deep down I felt empty.
In 2015 I went back to school while working full time. I became a Certified Relationship Coach for couples and individuals.

I now have my own business and I help other women like me to have a relationship where they feel accepted, supported, and loved for who they are.

Message to those who are newly diagnosed:

To those recently diagnosed with bipolar disorder, I invite you to take a slow, deep breath and remember this: you are not alone. Even if the words “bipolar disorder” feel heavy or confusing, this diagnosis is not the entirety of who you are. It’s not your identity or a label that limits your future. It’s simply a new chapter. With the right treatment you can build a life that’s beautiful, rich, and deeply meaningful. You’ll discover strength and resilience you didn’t know you had, especially as you begin to understand yourself and your emotions rather than fear them. You may notice other gifts about yourself you didn’t know you had. Learn to channel them in ways that support your wellbeing. As you move forward, let self-care become non-negotiable. Prioritize sleep, nourish your body, stay connected to people who truly love you, and give yourself permission to slow down when your mind and heart need rest. And remember that moments of struggle do not define your worth or your potential, they are a normal part of life. You are still you. And with knowledge, support, and compassion for yourself, the life you want is absolutely within reach.

Ana

Something I am proud of:

Message to those who are newly diagnosed:

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