The first time I truly got depressed was when I was 20 years old and the guy I was involved with told me that although he really liked me, he was still in love (with his ex-girlfriend). It was downhill from there. Failed relationship after failed relationship. More...
Disclaimer: the purpose of this blog is not to discourage you from taking meds, but to be informed about the meds you take and to be open with your doctor about the side effects you experience. I haven’t always been full of self-confidence or high self-esteem....
“Hey, how are you?” Oh man. Yikes. Whoa. Here we go again. I pause and consider my options in response to this question. If you have bipolar or experience any other form of mental illness, you probably understand why this question can be so tricky to answer. Do I...
This is the million dollar question. If you’re newly diagnosed, the idea of being on medication for the rest of your life can be terrifying. If you’ve been on medications for years and now they have stopped working, the possibility of no...
May cause depression. Three of the scariest words I’ve ever read. May. Cause. Depression. As a person living with bipolar, moods are a central point when making decisions. If I take this job will I be happy? Will I be forced to give up free time and activities...
The summer of 2013/2014 was magnificent, exhilarating and glorious. It was also a manic summer. I had just come out of one of the darkest winters of my life, where I was hospitalised and everything had ground to a halt for months. Spring came around, and with it...
For many of us who have had bipolar disorder for several years, we may need to undergo a medication change for various reasons. When you are taking medications over the long term, they may stop working as well as they did initially. Or a new drug might...
What is ‘stable’? After 6 years of constant ups and downs I wouldn’t know what euthymia was like if it slapped me in the face. I was diagnosed with unipolar depression when I was 20 and up until 22 (when I was re-diagnosed with bipolar), I thought I had been...
Thats not a real illness. I dont believe in mental health. If you dont need medication, you must not really have bipolar. These are just a few of the long stream of comments from people in my life, the most recent being You know, I dont think youre...
I want to talk to you all about something that I experienced very intensely when I first started taking medication. What happened was I felt a very strong dull feeling inside. I was no longer feeling the lows, but I was also no longer feeling the highs either. So, I...
I have been on an emotional roller coaster lately. I was feeling really anxious and depressed, so my psychiatrist upped my meds. I then felt worse. Crying every day. Crying for no reason. My parents came over one day while I was crying,...
A few of my friends who know that I have been diagnosed with bipolar have come to ask for advice on how to help someone they know, someone who seems to be going off the rails. Recently an ex-colleague asked about how to engage a friend who has stopped taking his...
When I’m high, I can fly. When I’m low, I sink into the deepest, darkest place. I keep wishing I could change this.One of my medications in particular gets me through the day. It’s actually supposed to help with anxiety, but it sort of has the...
Therapists are useful in helping a consumer understand how one is feeling and thinking, this is also known as talk therapy. Many issues are discussed and it has been proven useful to help with stability and managing symptoms. But what do you do when you’re struggling...
I hope my readers are taking it day by day. Remember don’t ever let the light inside of you dim. This month’s topic I’m going to address is ”Why hospitalization is so important and what important and positive role does it play in a person’s...
Last month I gave a webinar for International Bipolar Foundation (IBPF) entitled Removing Obstacles: A Naturopathic Perspective on Treatment. In that webinar I discussed the philosophy and therapeutic order of naturopathic medicine and gave some examples related...
This Monday I cried tears of joy for the first time in many years. Probably since my diagnosis, thirteen years ago. I didn’t even cry at my wedding, and my husband is everything to me. So what made me weep openly with happiness? A new...
Pills. Ah, pills. Pill is such an innocuous-sounding word, but anyone with bipolar disorder who takes medication knows that pills are anything but harmless. However, unless you depend on medications to keep you stable, and unless you’ve...
I’m so happy it’s the middle of the week already! Nothing major or stressful has happened, but I’m looking forward to the kiddos having a three day weekend. No stress in getting everyone around in the morning for three days will be nice. Believe me, I’m happy I don’t...
I never knew what “pdoc” meant until I was diagnosed with bipolar one disorder, and learned that it’s a shorthand term used for psychiatrists by those in the bipolar community.My pdoc is wonderful. Out of the myriad of doctors I’ve seen...
This is the third blog in a series about a recent psychiatric hospital stay that I had in December of 2013. To read the first post click here. On the second day of my hospital stay last December, I had a big realization. I was not on ANY...
Recently my seven year old was rushed to the emergency room. In the past two weeks this kid has been poked with needles, had ultrasounds done, been seen by numerous doctors, and is scheduled for more tests to figure out what has caused her medical issues and how...
I’m just going to babble here! For most of you that have read my blog posts you know I’m good at that!The last 2 years have been a battle for me and in the end, when I look at the big picture of it all I almost lost that battle. I almost gave in and gave...
Recently I struggled with writer’s block. I really wanted to have the satisfaction of writing something meaningful, though, so I sat down and fumbled in front of my computer. Facebook was calling my name, but I told it to buzz off! I...
I have Bipolar II. Usually, I am well managed by a combination of medications and counseling. I do not usually battle extremes because usually my meds work. But not today.Today, electricity pulses just underneath my skin, racing from my fingertips to my toes and back...
The Content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard...
It’s very frustrating when you can’t get medical attention because of the medication you are on. Here… Let me explain. Over the weekend I moved from my three bedroom house into a two bedroom apartment. There was a lot of sorting, packing, lifting,...
After being a fan of the International Bipolar Foundation blogging community, it is an honor to share my perspectives about living with bipolar disorder with you. I wish to help you feel less alone in living with this mood disorder, and to emulate the I.B.F.’s mission...
Whilst away on holiday recently I became aware of the near-constant narrative that goes on in my head about food, weight, and appearance. This is my attempt at faithfully capturing the narrative in order to explore my eating issues which are, I am told, subclinical,...
Today I am focusing on Evanescences song Lithium. Lithium is a drug sometimes associated with bipolar disorder since it has been fairly successful in helping stabilize manic and depressive episodes. Lithium was first used to treat mania in 1970. Kay Jamison wrote...
I was sitting around the other day thinking about how long it has been since I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder at the age of 18 and all that has happened since then. It’s quite interesting because I seem to remember my first inpatient stay still so vividly, but I...
I have Bipolar Disorder 1 with medication resistant depression. At one point, I was taking up to five different medications just to control my Bipolar Disorder. It was horrible. I’d take a medication for a few months, then have to have the dosage increased or even...
Happy pills, I’ve got those happy pills…Recently I was fortunate enough to be interviewed by Philippa Willetts, a blogger and tweeter who has just launched a new podcast called Converge. Philippa plans to use podcasts to look at various forms of activism and, as a...
As far as I am concerned , electroconvulsive therapy (ECT) is the most controversial treatment I have received. In 1991, I was hospitalized for six months. I am a very compliant patient suffering from rapid cycling bipolar disorder. If recommended by a doctor I am...
The latest that has been going on with me is the tumultuous depression that has spiked in my life due to our (my husband and myself) living situation. I am thirty-one years old. My husband is twenty-eight. We are living in the basement of my parents’ home. This...
What was going on when you were first diagnosed? Do you remember your symptoms? Do you remember where you were and what happened? Why or how you ended up seeing a Doctor or Psychiatrist? Was your family involved? Or were you alone?I first noticed that I saw the robins...
I went to my psychiatrist Friday for a follow-up from my initial visit a month ago. I’d had high hopes with the Wellbutrin/anxiety pill prescription combo. I felt better…happy…for a couple weeks. Then, depression set in. Like the can’t-get-out-of-bed variety. It...
“I’d rather been skinny and crazy than fat and sane.”And that is no joke. We talk about side effects of our medications but what about the side effects we get from the side effects of your medication. I’m talking about fat. Yup. A woman’s favorite word to hate:F A...
Are side effects getting you down? Almost every medication out there comes with some sort of side effect. As people with mental illness we take our share of medication on a routine basis so we are very well aware of all the different changes that can occur. With each...
Well, first, I’d like to give a shout-out to Cover Girl Lash Blast mascara. I spent a better part of today crying, and no smudging, no running, nothing! So that was a bright, shiny, silver lining. Other than that…well, one silver lining per day is better than nothing,...
Well, first, I’d like to give a shout-out to Cover Girl Lash Blast mascara. I spent a better part of today crying, and no smudging, no running, nothing! So that was a bright, shiny, silver lining. Other than that…well, one silver lining per day is better than nothing,...
DISCLAIMOR: The very nature of medication is controversial. I am not a doctor. I do not have MD after my name. I am merely a woman living with Bipolar 1 Disorder. This is my experience with medication. These are my truths. In no way, shape or form will I ever give...
Recently I discovered that the medication I’ve been on since 2008 (Epilim) causes a side effect (cysts in ovary) that is somewhat worrisome given the results of a recent health screening (I have a few cysts that are a few cms in size) and my maternal family...
A couple of weeks ago, I had an initial assessment with a psychologist from my Community Mental Health Team. The purpose of the session was to look at how talking therapies might be of benefit to me in helping me manage my bipolar disorder. We started by talking...
When is a good time for my friends to ask about how I’m doing with my meds? Or whether I’ve been taking them constantly?I asked myself these questions recently because my colleagues know about my condition and they often ask me about my meds. While I...
I’m racing out the door with my work bag slung over my shoulder, a glass of water in one hand, and my handful of morning medications in the other. Anti-depressant? Check. Mood stabilizer? Check. Adderall? Check. Anti-anxiety? Check. I gulp them down with the...
