Loud noises bother me to the point of rage during certain moods. If I am near switching moods to mania, the noise will send me into mania quicker and launch a case of full-blown rage. I also think the constant assault on my ears can trigger an episode of mania even if I wasn’t ready to switch moods.
I am hearing more and more about people with this trouble with bipolar. Noise has bothered me for as long as I can think of, but I never put two and two together until I started reading more about it. I am constantly learning about my bipolar and read everything I can.
Summertime is agony for me because the sound of flip flops slapping on the ground or floor drives me to the point that I can feel the rage coming on. Humming is another noise that irritates me to the point of losing control. I want to scream at these people, but I can just imagine what they would think of me. These are all noises society is used to, but to me they are major irritants.
Dogs barking non-stop, trains coming through every hour or so (we live near the tracks), and the planes taking off and coming in (we are on the flight pattern of a major airport) are other noises that send me into a state of rage.
I also can’t tolerate very loud music. Even being partially deaf myself, I don’t like loud music or television.
This has bothered me so bad in the past that I have gone to the ER because it had bothered me to the point of losing control and just wanting to scream and run down the middle of the street to try and outrun the sound.
It is not just the case of being angry, I become totally enraged by these noises. Our house is surrounded by dogs. They all spend all of their time outdoors and these dogs bark at every noise, sound or person they hear. We have a cat and a dog. The dog barks occasionally, but the cat never shuts up. I want to toss her out the 2nd floor window she annoys me so much. I can only handle so much meowing from her.
Telephones ringing also annoy me. My dad’s landline phone rings non-stop all day. He doesn’t answer it because he screens calls so I have to hear his awful ring tone and the message on the machine almost every time over and over again.
I take solace in the fact that it only seems to be that bad during a manic phase and my mood stabilizer has been stopping the manic phases lately so I have had some relief. If you find loud noises affect you, don’t feel alone. It seems to be perfectly normal for those of us with bipolar disorder. Although I am sure you find it as annoying as I do.
I did find that head phones and something to listen to have a way of drowning out the annoying sounds and only allowing welcome ones in. I like to binge on Netflix and that absorbs my attention and blocks out the loud noises. Favorite music would do it too.
To read more from Teresa, see the rest of her posts for IBPF here or visit her personal blog here.