Often times, people are depressed after the holiday season for a variety of reasons, but the New Year brings with it new possibilities if we are open to them. Every moment we are alive is a new moment so every moment brings a new possibility even though we may...
When I got my dog, Lena, just over two years ago, I didn’t yet know I had bipolar disorder. I had been diagnosed with major depression by my college’s health services and given only an anti-depressant to take. I had been high as a kite all summer – my apartment was...
I hope you all are having a wonderful Holiday Season and you all have a blessed Christmas. This month’s blog entry will be a poem that I wrote; I hope it brings you comfort and strength, though this time of year is a joyous time for many, many others suffer alone and...
It is that time of year again when we are supposed to be joyful, surrounded by friends and family, and have a generous heart. Many of us though find this time of year to be depressing especially because we are supposed to be in the Holiday Spirit. We are...
The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention’s (AFSP) logo is a life preserver. I think the idea is that the organization brings people together who want to preserve life and prevent suicide. For those of us who have tried to help a loved one who has to navigate...
We all know someone or have gone through the experience of losing friends because of a mental illness. I don’t have many friends right now and I go day by day watching my two sisters, my Mom, my Dad, and even going into a store, I see girls laughing together and the...
Jumping off my balcony, abusing drugs, walking down the middle of a highway and neglecting meds. Thats how I use to ring in the New Year and wish my family a Merry Christmas. Since Ive been diagnosed bipolar in 2011 Ive found that once the Christmas season hits, I...
Often, there are times when we don’t want to do anything; nothing inspires, nothing motivates, nothing is uplifting. “It seems that the weight of the world is bearing down on me and I can’t possibly do anything about it-I should just go. It’s just one thing after...
To Loathe Every time I looked in the mirror I hated what I saw. Self-loathing had been a big part of my identity. Why did I hate myself so much? Why did I look at my reflection with contempt and disgust? I am not sure how or when it started, but many of...
I am fortunate to be mentally stable and manage my bipolar disorder well. That being said I sometimes have a tendency to not always have a positive mindset throughout my day. At times negative things that people say or do bother me and I’m not able to let...
Nine years ago this December, my mental illness erupted through the surface of my otherwise regular life. Work was a snowstorm of activity with the holidays approaching, and I remember feeling super stressed out trying to keep all my end-of-the-year meetings with my...
We’ve all heard it before, or something similar, “This too shall pass”. “Just puts your big girl panties on”. “You’ve been here before, you can do it again”. While our loved ones mean well, in the throes of...
November 22, 2014 is International Survivors of Suicide Loss Day, a day that much of society most likely does not know anything about. The American Foundation of Suicide Prevention (AFSP) in recognition of a resolution that Senator Harry Reid introduced to the senate,...
Getting help for my bipolar disorder was one of the hardest and best things I’ve done. I’m a pretty proud and independent person so opening up and making myself vulnerable was extremely daunting. I was in my third and final year of university when I knew...
Resilience is defined as the ability to become strong, healthy, or successful again after something bad happens or the ability of something to return to its original shape after it has been pulled, stretched, pressed, bent, etc. If you want a real-world example of...
I’ve been wanting to write about this topic for a while, but I kept putting it off. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to do it, but more and more I found myself easily distracted. (Thank you social media! I’m blaming you!) 😉 I realized that the...
Talk therapy is a big part of my treatment plan. I cant go without it. I know medication is a necessity for me, but I need my therapist. I need cognitive behavioral techniques, and I need coping skills. Its a struggle for me to simply...
South Africa The sad bigotry, Like stalactites, Cold fingers, Paw at the caverns of my mind Phantoms, reminitions of my past, Await me, In cochineal cloaks, Those ghosts of yesterday To feed again, Extinguish the...
Mental Health Awareness Week occurred from October 5-11 and on October 11 I participated in one of the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention’s ‘Out of the Darkness Walks’ in Northern California. I was planning to go alone because I had attempted to persuade...
This week my old friend really wanted to meet up with me. I just had a very deep depression episode and now Im trying to go back to society. Im looking for a new job, doing things which I used to love and doing as much as possible to feel good. And stay out of...
I want to talk to you all about something that I experienced very intensely when I first started taking medication. What happened was I felt a very strong dull feeling inside. I was no longer feeling the lows, but I was also no longer feeling the highs either. So, I...
I have loved writing, for as long as I can remember. I have written during many of my happiest moments in my life and of course during some of the toughest times as well. Within just the last couple of weeks, my husband’s and my world turned upside down....
For a number of years I worked in the financial industry and HAD to closely follow the news to be well-informed. Near the end of that time I started taking various self-improvement courses and started having different sessions with various non-traditional...
Suicide has been in the media a lot over the last little while due to the very sad passing of Robin Williams. As such a public figure, his death has started a broader conversation about suicide. I do not know his circumstances and so I will not dwell on what lead Mr....
The day Robin Williams passed away my husband woke me up from an impromptu nap. I had a rough day and I was very tired. The first words I heard from my nap were “Robin Williams passed away”. How? “Apparent suicide” he replied. Now I don’t normally get emotional...
I write this entry in my blog with a very heavy heart, as I mourn with the rest of the world over the tragic news of Robin Williams passing. A brilliant man, in every sense of the word, an amazing actor, a Talented Comedian, a man who shared...
I hate myself right now. I hate myself every time I’m depressed. I just started a new medication after gaining 9 pounds in a month on the previous med I tried, so I’m depressed about that on top of having general depression. Since I’m starting over...
I’ve had episodes of depression throughout my life, but it was only seventeen years ago that I realized I had a mental illness. Up until that time, I blamed the episodes on circumstances of my life like being away from home my first time, escaping from Vietnam...
I’m here to talk to you about guilt. This is something that I felt for several years after I got help for my disorder. I couldn’t believe the things that I had said and done to both my husband and mother. I was beyond devastated. I was apologizing...
Every time someone suggests I read an article on having Bipolar, I discover that articles written or paraphrased by normal people always find a way to quip on how people with mental illness should adopt more normal activities in order to enjoy life. It is appalling...
It’s only a 4 letter word. It’s a terrific motivator. It determines whether or not I think life is worth living. And if it’s lacking it’s awfully hard to move on with daily tasks. Yes I am talking about hope. It’s funny how quickly...
As a woman with bipolar I disorder I have experienced many major depressive episodes. During those times I’ve not only relied heavily on family, but also on friends and church leaders. As a recipient of the compassionate phrase: “I’m here if you need to talk”, I want...
In every one’s life there are moments when you feel like you will never be able to get up and live again. I had one of those moments in my life. During which I thought I was done with everyone. I had crashed hard. Harder than I ever did. It was a really bad time.It...
Those of us who have a mental illness are sometimes told and also think that our mental illness is our fault because we lack faith. This is not the case. Mental illness is a biological disorder and can affect anyone. Let me tell you a story found in the Bible. The...
Today, despite it being summer and my not having to rush my two girls to school, I woke up in a big ‘ol funk. At 5:00 a.m. our precocious Lucy, now a thirteen-week-old bundle of energy, acted as a canine alarm clock and woke me up. She was raring to...
I hope my readers are taking it day by day. Remember don’t ever let the light inside of you dim. This month’s topic I’m going to address is ”Why hospitalization is so important and what important and positive role does it play in a person’s...
As I was sipping a hot cup of tea in a breezy evening, for the first time, I could feel the calmness in my soul as the wind touched my face. For so long, I had been struggling to feel this way. I had never felt this way. What was this calmness? I wondered. It was as...
May is Mental Health Awareness Month. It got me thinking about when I was first aware of my own mental illness.For me, it came on gradually. As a middle school kid, I battled waves of sadness. It didn’t help that I was bullied mercilessly. As I got older, the...
In my role as a mental illness speaker and blogger, I receive a lot of comments and questions. The one item that stands out is that there is a lot of confusion over what bipolar disorder is and what it isnt.Many folks believe that bipolar disorder is just a more...
Good afternoon readers, I hope this entry finds you fighting to keep going. Because I truly believe with all my heart every precious life has such Value in this world, and I want to offer you as much encouragement as I...
We all know the importance of mental health awareness, and doing our part of erasing the stigma that still surrounds Disorders like Bipolar. As March 30th approaches which is World Bipolar Day, its also Van Goghs birthday who is a well known Dutch impressionist...
Ever since my bipolar depression lifted last year, I’ve felt I’ve been tumbling around in my dryer. Maybe that’s not the best analogy, but it has been a long, strange, emotional trip! Ive been holding my breath both literally and figuratively. ...
The Content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard...
I am going to touch upon a subject in which I might offend someone I know. I’m willing to take this chance, however, for if I influence anyone who may someday take action if given the chance, I will be thrilled. If someone you know is hospitalized in a...
We often hear people speak of the “chicken or the egg” theory. Which came first? The same can be asked of which comes first in people that are both overweight and depressed. Which came first? I know that I was overweight as a child. Was I...
Do you have pets? I do. I have two. One is a feisty little lovebird with a big attitude. His name is Chicklet. This picture is of my other pet. Her name is Maggie. She is my 8 month old puppy. I got her when she was 14 weeks old. She’s wonderful, cute, the new love of...
I will attempt to try to describe it the best way I can. When I am cycling and in a low mood, I become angry as it appears to arrive out of nowhere. One moment I am feeling fine, then boom without any warning it rears its ugly head. I imagine it as a super villain who...
On the Scott Inside Out – Natural Mental wellness facebook page last week, I asked what tips people would like to learn about in terms of bipolar disorder. And also what would give them the most value. Someone responded by wanting to know how...
Below is a link to a Depression Quiz. You might want to take it then come back here for more information about Depression – The Misunderstood Mood Disorder.Depression Quiz”Depression is one of the most tragically misunderstood words in the English...
I’m so tearful. I’m embarrassed sitting here at the gate waiting for a plane that will take me away.I cannot even begin thinking, much less speaking, about returning to SO MUCH UNCERTAINTY…without eyes brimming and overflowing. People sitting around...
