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For many of us who have had bipolar disorder for several years, we may need to undergo a medication change for various reasons.  When you are taking medications over the long term, they may stop working as well as they did initially.  Or a new drug might come out with less side effects and a promise of higher quality of life. I am...
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Support

February 4, 2015
As we go through our journey with our disorder, we need support. Whether it's from family, friends, or a higher power, it is essential that we have someone that will always have our backs. We can't do this alone. I'm forever grateful for my God, my husband, and my Mom. All of them show me support on a daily basis. As soon as I found out that...
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Benefits of Having a Label

February 4, 2015
January 28, 2015 was Bell Let’s Talk Day in Canada.  It’s an initiative by a major company to get more people talking about mental health.  The intention is to reduce stigma and raise awareness.  Bell donated five cents towards mental health programs for every social media share, text, tweet, or call made on that day.  It’s...
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Melancholy It’s winter.I knew you’d be knocking at my door soon.Your familiar spirit--always unwelcomed--but persistent. She asked me “What are you depressed about?”I wanted to shout “About the serotonin depletion,The change in weather that makes my synapses misfire,My unrelenting neurochemistry is why!” But, instead, I cite the job...
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('Changes' song lyric sample from David Bowie, album "Hunky Dory" 1971)When the seasons change, I often have a bipolar relapse, one that starts small, like a snowball, gathering speed and size as it rolls down the hill, exploding on the impact of hitting bottom! Boom! On September 24 this fall I had to admit, as anhedonia and thoughts of throwing...
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I recently watched a documentary called “Titanic’s Final Mystery.” It put forth a new theory that, due to unusual weather conditions on the night of the Titanic tragedy, there was a mirage that prevented the ship’s lookouts from seeing the infamous iceberg. It’s an interesting theory, though there’s debate as to whether it’s true. But the bottom...
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In the beginning I thought that it would kill me, my personality, and my future. But after a few weeks I’m hugely grateful for this experience. I got there because I wanted to attempt suicide. I’ve had a few suicide attempts before but this one was extremely dangerous and real. And so sudden and unexpected. So when my feet touched the ground...
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Yoga is more than what you want your body to look like. What do you want your life to look like? The core philosophy of Yoga - not just seeking fulfillment in the material world while still living in it - offers a structure of restrictions and observances to favor which can lead to a sense of “true fulfillment,” especially to lovers of and...
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Out in the Milkweed

January 28, 2015
I wrote this piece to express how I've felt stigmatized by those who haven't gotten past how I've been doing better with bipolar one.  While it's obvious in this piece that I am angry, I believe there is hope for healing for us all."Out in the Milkweed”In some disturbing way that you would never openly admit You want me to remain Mentally ill...
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My Biggest Competitor

January 28, 2015
It’s no secret that I have struggled with bipolar disorder for several years. What may be less known is that I have also fought hard to overcome numerous setbacks and personal losses as a result of my illness. I don’t like that I have had to deal with an illness as cruel as bipolar disorder can be, but the more I focus on how unfair it is the less...
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I didn’t realize it, but I have been on a quest for the past 20 years. At first, it felt like I was just trying to figure myself out. I wasn’t happy with my life as it was laid out for me. So like many people in their late teens and early twenties, I bounced around from place to place, trying on different “personality outfits” to see which...
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Bipolar Mother, Bipolar Son

January 15, 2015
I dreamed of having a child throughout my formative years.  When asked what I would be when I grew up, I readily answered “A Mommy!”  I doted on baby dolls, babysat throughout my teen years and dressed every cat we ever owned up as a baby.  I deeply wanted to know the connection, but had problems with my reproductive system,...
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