This is Part 4 in a 5-Part Series: “When the World is Too Bright: An Intensive View of Mania from On the Ground” (Read Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, and Part 5 here) I moved back home with my mother a few years ago for financial reasons. Now that I’m back in...
This is Part 1 in a 5-Part Series: “When the World is Too Bright: An Intensive View of Mania from On the Ground” (Read Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, and Part 5 here) This is my fifth mania in the nine years since I have been diagnosed with bipolar disorder....
If you walked into my house right now, this is what you would see: dishes piling up, laundry in piles waiting to be folded, a dirty floor and me in bed. It’s happening again. I’m having another manic episode. This one, though, is different. Maybe it’s the empty house...
My name is Nicole, but most people call me Nic. Mostly because its easier and faster to say, but also because Australians are fond of a nickname. I have bipolar disorder Type 1 and am presently recovering from another lengthy manic episode. I could try and put a...
For parents taking care of a child who has autism, life is an everyday challenge. Sometimes, it’s good. Other times, not so much. But what if you’re a single parent? What if you’re a single parent who has bipolar disorder? What would it be like then?...
Hey! Hey you! Yeah, I’m talking to you over there. The one with bipolar disorder. The one that constantly looks down on themselves and wishes they were someone else. The one that wonders what happened in their life to deserve this wretched beast of an illness. I’m...
If you walked into my house right now, this is what you would see: dishes piling up, laundry in piles waiting to be folded, a dirty floor and me in bed. Its happening again. Im having another manic episode. This one, though, is different. Maybe its the empty house...
Some days, I want to get off the ride. Some days, I just want to be “normal.” I don’t want to deal with unpleasant side effects of medications. I don’t want to endure my lows or spiral out of control during my highs. I don’t want to be crazy. I don’t want to fall...
We have seen a lot of movies that put the spotlight on mental illness. Movies like “Girl, Interrupted,” “Prozac Nation,” “Rain man,” and very recently “Silver Linings Playbook” and “Infinite Polar Bear,” to...
This is the fourth in a series of 26 posts covering a variety of stress management tools and techniques, starting with the letter A. For some background information on stress and bipolar disorder, the blogger recommends reading her three-part series, “Getting a Handle...
I was driving much too fast. I didnt see the stop sign. I sailed right through. The stereo was pumping and my hands gripped the wheel. My foot was pushing harder on the accelerator. I came up to a second stop sign and again I saw nothing. I pushed on the pedal to go...
Have you ever cheated on your best friend? Have you ever betrayed the trust of someone you cared about more deeply than yourself? How did it feel? For me, it felt like my entire world collapsed around me. My husband my best friend no longer trusts me. I broke my...
Several years ago, before I was diagnosed, during a particularly difficult bout of psychosis I believed I was a prophet receiving messages from God. I went days at a time without sleep, diligently documenting everything I heard, scribbling frantically and filling up...
Mania You wake up after only four hours asleep, but that’s ok, you feel fine. Today is going to be a great day, a productive day, one of the best days of your life. You get in the shower and sing every song you know, and keep singing as you dress up and do your...
Sometimes the hardest part about being married to someone with bipolar disorder is trying to reconcile the actions of the illness from the actions of the person. When you live with someone long enough you get to know them pretty well. You become comfortable...
I consider mania to be the forgotten orphan of the two poles of bipolar disorder with depression being the most discussed. Depression gets all the attention, all the talk, all the focus and mania is left out in the cold. On the International Bipolar Foundations...
Yesterday I was discharged from a psychiatric hospital after a five-week stay. I was hospitalised for mania and psychosis (you can read about it here). Instead of only feeling the expected excitement and joy, I also felt underlying apprehension and fear. But mostly,...
It seems that my last blog post was somewhat prophetic. I am currently sitting on a bed, in a psychiatric hospital, recovering from my second psychotic manic episode. This episode evolved much like the last did, with me becoming so elevated that I lost insight...
Sarah describes what mania feels like for her and how she has learned to manage it. Sarah regularly blogs for IBPF and has done some YouTube Videos for their channel. She now writes on a regular basis for the Dallas Morning Post as...
I was once a high-valued corporate spy, investigating customer service everywhere I went by working as a mystery shopper. After a year of luxury brand espionage, I went inactive. Why would I forgo hitting posh hair salons on the house, free smells, scrubs, and...
“I think you’re becoming elevated” are words that make the ground fall out from under my feet. When I hear someone even hint that I am unusually energetic, cheerful, speedy or irritable it feels like my grip on reality is weakening. I can picture my ascent into mania...
Did you know that two of the first human diseases described by the classical Greek physicians are mania (mixture of anger, rage, and euphoria) and melancholia (sadness)? Jules Angst and Andreas Marneros wrote a paper that scoured ancient writings for...
Mania is a very tough subject for me. When I’d go through the manic episodes it was very painful. I’ll admit, after I dealt with it in therapy, I just wanted to forget about it, but I know that’s not right for our readers. So, here goes… I deal with mania a lot....
Sometimes mania seems like the ugly stepchild of the bipolar duo of mania and depression. Depression seems to get all the hype, all the attention. And mania sits in a corner like Baby from Dirty Dancing. But if any of you have seen a loved one (or you yourself) have...
I was eighteen years old when I first experienced acute manic psychosis. I had just arrived at the University of Georgia for my freshman fall semester when I suddenly had what seemed like a profound spiritual awakening. I felt as if I was waking up from a bad dream,...
I sometimes wonder how and why many people who have bipolar disorder feel and become creative. I know, for example, when I am in mania I become far more into writing, descriptions, and reading book after book. I crave to live outside my life most of the time, but...
Quite a while ago I was told that during spring and summer I would most likely be controlling underlying mania and during winter I would be fighting depression. This is because medication doesn’t work very well for me, my moods are very seasonal and I have the type of...
Last month I participated in a Crisis Intervention Training (CIT) with local law enforcement. These officers, dispatchers, and prison guards were learning how to improve their interactions with people who have mental illness. It is a week-long training put on by...
‘It feels like a long way down.’ Yes it certainly does. The crashing fall from the highest peaks of manic elation to the deepest depths of despairing depression is devastating. My mood swings are like clockwork and for the past few years I would become gradually...
“Music washes away from the soul, the dust of everyday life”- Berthold AuerbachGrowing up, music was a big part of my household. Not that any of us played musical instruments but just, enjoying it. Dancing around the house. Singing at the top of our lungs....
2/25/15 Mania. I am manic as hell right now. I can’t sit still. Nothing is enough. It’s insatiable. I smoke too much, want sex too much, shop too much. And it’s never enough. Never. I have to keep going, keep seeking out...
Practicing self-care when it comes to Bipolar Disorder means that not only do I take my meds and see my doctor regularly, but also over the years I’ve learned a few “tricks” to help get me by. These are simple things that make my life, and the lives...
The summer of 2013/2014 was magnificent, exhilarating and glorious. It was also a manic summer. I had just come out of one of the darkest winters of my life, where I was hospitalised and everything had ground to a halt for months. Spring came around, and with it...
This is the first part in a 3 part series. We recommend reading them together.Part 2: Understanding Triggers and Vulnerabilities in Bipolar DisorderPart 3: Management Strategies for Successful Relapse PreventionI recently watched a documentary called...
I just finished filling out a WRAP plan with the help of my therapist. WRAP stands for Wellness Recovery Action Plan. The plan can be found at mentalhealthrecovery.com and is free to print out. This isn’t the first time I’ve filled out the plan. Years ago while I...
When I got my dog, Lena, just over two years ago, I didn’t yet know I had bipolar disorder. I had been diagnosed with major depression by my college’s health services and given only an anti-depressant to take. I had been high as a kite all summer – my apartment was...
Living in the Southern Hemisphere where Christmas and New Years is a time of long, hot days, and having Bipolar with ‘seasonal affective components’ usually results in me becoming elevated. The 15 hours of sunshine, hot weather and days of being active at the beach is...
My short but disastrous history of relationships and friendships, probably lend credence to the argument that it is next to impossible to live with a Bipolar 1 sufferer, with an lavish, lashing of PSTD, just to add a little extra spice. Personally, I fear...
Last year at this time, I was soaring high with my first full-blown manic episode. I was feeling better than I’ve felt in my entire life. Colors were brighter, music sounded better, and my talents came out like never before. I had recently taken up painting and...
