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Running is My Therapy

October 1, 2014
I woke up on Thursday, September 4th and the torture struck instantly. My head filled up like a water balloon, except it wasn't water I was filled with, it was disturbing, bizarre, negative and pesky thoughts. I recognized immediately from waking up I was unwell, but I proceeded onto my daily life. By Monday night the feelings both physically and...
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Triggers

September 30, 2014
Although I was officially diagnosed in March 2009 with Bipolar I disorder and began treatment, I am confident in saying that my bipolar episodes started well before that time.  If I could guess somewhat accurately, I would say it all started somewhere around the age of 18 … which would be the early 90’s.  If I only knew then what I do...
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This is part two of a three part series: Part One: Planning for a Family When You Have Bipolar Part Two: From Pregnant to Mommy The next thing that troubled me as my pregnancy progressed was how I was going to handle the labor and delivery. My psychiatrist sent a letter to my OB recommending I have a scheduled c-section. I knew that...
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   I have loved writing, for as long as I can remember. I have written during many of my happiest moments in my life and of course during some of the toughest times as well. Within just the last couple of weeks, my husband’s and my world turned upside down. I’ve been stable for so long, and yet what we are presently going through has...
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My Emotions Are Not Me

September 19, 2014
Being in a relationship with someone is both rewarding and frightening. There have been times during my 9-month-old relationship that I wonder how he is able to handle the intensity of my emotions. I remember one night, after we took our night walk, I was sitting in McDonalds and I started to sob uncontrollably. He didn’t seem fazed at all,...
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Taming My Dragon

September 19, 2014
My name is Nanieve and my journey with Bipolar 1 Disorder started around the age of twelve. I was also diagnosed with PTSD about two years ago. I am unable to look upon it as a curse, preferring to see it as a blessing. My phoenix wings if you like, my manias have allowed me to rise above the mundane and to achieve creative ecstasy I would...
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My Emotional Roller Coaster

September 18, 2014
I have been on an emotional roller coaster lately.  I was feeling really anxious and depressed, so my psychiatrist upped my meds.  I then felt worse.  Crying every day.  Crying for no reason.  My parents came over one day while I was crying, and my daughter told them, “She’s been crying a lot lately.”  I don’t want my...
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Writing Heals My Brain

September 17, 2014
I've turned to writing during many times of bipolar depression.  I know that many of you are writers too.  We write in blogs and in our journals. We email, take notes for classes, and once in a while, we even handwrite letters the old-fashioned way! So many forms of writing exist, and they can all serve us well in terms of catharsis...
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Bipolar Worries

September 16, 2014
At my last appointment with my psychiatrist, she told me I have too much anxiety about having bipolar disorder. No kidding? I mean what's there to be anxious about? Being stuck in complete darkness with unspeakable pain that only those who have depression can understand? Or, flying so high you think you're invincible, have no rational thoughts in...
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I have had episodes of depression throughout my life and once I was so happy after taking an antidepressant that I danced around my bedroom.  I didn’t realize I had a mental illness until I was 45 years old, and I didn’t know I had bipolar disorder until I was 59.  You would have thought that, at a younger age, I would have figured out...
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I'm a psychotherapist who has worked as a vocational rehabilitation counselor - that’s a specialist who helps people with disabilities, including bipolar disorder, find and keep meaningful work. I also have bipolar disorder myself, and have struggled over the years to find work that meets my own “special needs.” The research clearly shows...
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What Would I Say to Me?

September 4, 2014
What would I say to the younger me about being diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder and Anxiety Disorder?  This picture was taken 13 years ago.  I was 28 and oh so manic, but had no idea.  This was pre-diagnosis.  I traveled to two continents, several states, and multiple concerts on this particular U2 tour...something I had ...
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