It took me a few years to figure out just what I need to stay mentally healthy with no risk of relapse. I had been on the road to recovery so long that I forgot how important all the things I do every day are. I learned the hard way that I need to stay on my plan...
Often I hear of women getting together with one or more friends to do things to support one person and/or another. Some examples are getting a manicure, meeting for coffee, or going to a movie. Sadly this isnt as common in guys doing things together with their...
I used to think that I could tell easily whether or not I was feeling emotional. But recently, I have realised that it isnt as easy as I thought. There have been times that I thought I was calm enough when talking to my partner after a disagreement only to find out...
Headaches have been my companion off and on for years. I usually take Excedrine and Tylenol and put a cold pack on my neck. I often have to lie down as well. I even suffered with migraines for a time and lived with shots, dark rooms, and tremors. Having bipolar...
I was first diagnosed with bipolar disorder after a wildly embarrassing acute manic episode. I did it all. I claimed to be Jesus. I punched a friend, who I thought was the devil. I got arrested in the lobby of my freshman dormitory. I stripped off all my clothes and...
A month ago it was just another Tuesday morning: wake up, shower and dress, drink some coffee, then leave my husband and puppy at home to drive 45min to my doctors appointment. It felt like the same as before: go in for 45 min, talk, get refill prescriptions if I...
Human beings are social animals. We live in communities and in addition to our basic needs of clothing, shelter and food, we need strong bonds, of belongingness to go through the motions of life through good and bad times. In the case of a serious health issue...
As far as I’m concerned this week is the best week of the year. It’s not only Mental Illness Awareness Week, but here in Australia it’s Mental Health Week. Although mental health promotion and awareness of mental illness should be continuous throughout the year (not...
When I was first diagnosed with bipolar disorder, I was in shock. I had no idea about mental illness or mania or psychosis. I had no idea that my brain could be responsible for altering my reality, for making me think certain thoughts, or for making me feel sad when...
Life is a beautiful fragile precious gift, that’s why we call it the present. Life is ever changing, nothing in this life is certain except that one day all our lives will come to an end, when this life is over, it’s inevitable. We cannot put a stop to the hands of...
Awareness for mental illness is so important because of the stigma attached to it. When I had told a former friend that I have bipolar disorder, she jumped back and yelled, “Don’t attack me!” Seriously? I’ve never attacked anyone in my life. Sadly, that’s not the...
I know what you’re thinking, “A coloring book? Has she lost her mind?” But studies have shown that adults struggling with mental illnesses have benefitted greatly from coloring books geared for grown-ups and I’m one of them! I was given one for my 29th birthday...
Self-harm is a way of dealing with deep emotional pain. Hurting myself made me feel better when it was the only way I knew how to cope with feelings like anxiety, sadness, self-loathing, emptiness, guilt, and rage. Its an outward expression of inner painpain that...
“Are you on Facebook?” Those four little words make me cringe more than anything. Never did one sentence cause so much fear and anxiety. Then I have to weigh very carefully how I respond. There are questions I ask myself about the person: Are they open-minded? Will...
I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder when I was young, fifteen or sixteen years old, but before that I had been seen by doctors, psychiatrists, and psychologists for depression. I think ‘manic’ stages were assumed to be me being a ‘normal’ kid: happy, productive, and...
I think its safe to say that many of us who have bipolar disorder struggle with weight gain. The main reason is that medications can affect our appetite. My medication makes me crave sweets like never before. A woman I met in my bipolar support group had just...
In this video, Sarah talks about the dull feeling she had when she first starting taking medication. It eventually went away after she worked with her psychiatrist to adjust the medication to what works best for her. Read more of Sarah’s posts for IBPF here....
When youre first diagnosed with bipolar disorder, its normal to be confused, scared, and upset. You may be grieving, and thats okay. The pain may feel unbearable, but it will eventually fade. Though you may feel alone right now, you are never alone. There are...
I sit every day on the third floor of the student center eating my lunch. Today I was ruminating about how up until now I was usually eating lunch with friends, laughing and having fun, but these days, it is not at all like that. I do not have friends at school, or at...
Think…Think My thoughts are wild. Untamed. Running wild like mustangs Think…Think My mind is a minefield. One wrong step and its blown Think…Think One day bad. One day good. Think…Think One day fast. One day...
Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) was originally designed to treat individuals diagnosed as having Borderline Personality Disorder (which I was), but has skills and tools for everyone. DBT has been, notably, successful in individuals with Bipolar Disorder and PTSD as...
I started playing ice hockey at the age of 25. About four years after I started I took up goaltending. I loved it so much that in 2001 I decided I wanted to become a sports psychologist. I always knew that I wanted to go back to school to get my Masters, but it wasn’t...
Recently I had coffee with my cousin and we were discussing the times I have been unwell. This lead to me talking about how I write for print and online sources about bipolar, my passion for mental health promotion and how I volunteer for a mental health organisation....
I know, I know…some of you guys out there have raised eyebrows as youre reading this. You may be thinking something along the lines of self care is for women and/or self care is for sissies. I used to think that way too. In the past five years my...
Fall is upon us, and for many people it’s the season of stress. School starts back, work picks up, the days get shorter, the weather gets colder, and the holiday season begins—all potential sources of stress. So in honor of fall, I’m writing a series about managing...
After I started getting treatment, I so badly wanted to find something to distract me. I tried so many different hobbies and jobs that I met with so much failure. It was painful. Part of the problem was that I wanted to move on so badly that I didn’t take the time to...
They are opposite states… Solitude is usually actively sought after and is a personal choice that comes from an inner yearning. Isolation is usually actively avoided and is forced from the outside. Solitude allows for expansion and freedom of thought, providing...
There are a lot of things about suicide that aren’t talked about. The thing that comes to mind for me, having survived a suicide attempt early this year, is what happens when you survive. Once you get out of the hospital, you will probably be happy to have your...
I was eighteen years old when I first experienced acute manic psychosis. I had just arrived at the University of Georgia for my freshman fall semester when I suddenly had what seemed like a profound spiritual awakening. I felt as if I was waking up from a bad dream,...
The couch at the hospital near the bed of my brother felt hard and impersonal. He was facing surgery to have part of his foot amputated as a result of diabetes. The medical staff told us he would go into surgery at 11:45 am. It turned out to be 2:30 pm. Since he...
Sarah shares her advice for teens who have bipolar disorder and aren’t sure if they should go to college or not. Going to college is absolutely possible. The most important things that have helped Sarah be successful are sticking to her treatment plan and a...
I can’t believe that I’m actually writing this in the middle of a mixed episode right now, or presenting mixed features of a bipolar episode, because for the most part when my mind races like this, I can’t even articulate a relevant thought let alone write a series of...
A question central to my recent discussions with my therapist is: Is my identity too centered on my mental illness? When I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder in 2013, I was thankful. Not upset, not rejecting. But thankful. For months and months prior to my...
In my last blog post ‘My Experience with Psychotic Depression: Part 1’, I wrote about how I became suicidally depressed and psychotic, which lead to a hospitalisation. In this post I will write about the changing point of my depression and how I got better. I was...
Previously I have written about friends asking me what to do if they think that someone they know has bipolar. Recently, I have been thinking of friends who think that they themselves may have the disorder. They come from different circumstances but one common...
When an earthquake occurs in the ocean, the ripple effect causes tsunamis whose effects are felt on shores thousands of miles away. The intrigue about tsunamis is that they can never be predicted and even when they are anticipated the damage caused is always...
Growing up, I was the one who looked up to everyone: 5 siblings, my parents, tons of older cousins, aunts, uncles, and grandparents. I had idolized many of them. Now that Im becoming an adult, despite 23 not being old (even though I feel it sometimes), I feel like...
Being a teen is rough. That’s the understatement of the century. Add having bipolar disorder on top of that and life just gets that much harder. I didn’t get diagnosed until I was 22, (I’m 28 now) but the signs were starting to show when I was in high school. It was...
In high school I was often sad. Im not a doctor, but have heard that depression can be an early indicator of bipolar disorder. I was also the dreamy-look-out-the-window type of ADD. Mom always says I lacked the inner knowledge of the social pecking order. My...
I was in the tenth grade at the age of 14. I was never popular. I stayed in the background and kept to myself or at least attempted to. My peers bullied me and I gave up on fighting back. I took it, internalized it, and never spoke of it when I got home. What was the...
Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT) is an effective approach for a variety of issues, including bipolar disorder. Its based on the ancient philosophical idea that suffering isnt the result of what happens to us, but the result of how we interpret what happens to us....
Good afternoon readers, I need to write about an issue that’s growing by epic proportions and it hits close to home for me on a personal level, dealing with depression and suicidal thoughts. I am not a clinical psychologist. However, I have experienced firsthand the...
Ive read in many places that the average person has around 70,000 thoughts per day. You may have already heard this. That is a huge number! Seventy thousand. Its also been said that the typical person has more negative than positive thoughts. And for...
Several posts ago I wrote about my experience with psychotic mania (‘My Manic Summer’) and now I want to write about when I was psychotically depressed. I said in ‘My Manic Summer’ that I have only experienced psychosis once and that was when I was manic, but I was...
I’m writing this three days fresh out of an acute treatment unit. It’s a locked facility similar to a mental hospital, but smaller. It’s not the first time I’ve voluntarily admitted myself to this unit due to extreme symptoms and personal safety issues, but it’s...
Does anyone know where the kids are? Oh, theyre being watched while I see my family friend and doctor, as I always do when Im having issues. Because my home is in escrow, I had to clear out for their final physical inspection. The contract is on the card table. The...
Though problematic or compulsive internet use has been debated as far as validity and scope, it is not currently recognized as a psychiatric disorder. However, a cautionary word from my Mom: Anything in excess is a problem. Everything in moderation! With that...
The other day I noticed that a plant in my cactus garden began to grow something that looked like horns and then like green candy canes! At first I thought I should pluck them out because they were weird looking. I asked a friend what she thought I should...
When you’ve been newly diagnosed with bipolar, your world can get turned upside down. I know that mine did. A lot of people, myself included, just want things to go back to normal and get back to being a productive member of society. Understandable. But how do you...
As I weave in and out of social justice spaces at the University of Kansas and its town, Lawrence, I regularly track what conversations are most prevalent and determine what the culture and nature of social justice rhetoric is around me. Intersectionality and...
