Category: Support

Awareness through the Eyes of Van Gogh

We all know the importance of mental health awareness, and doing our part of erasing the stigma that still surrounds Disorders like Bipolar. As March 30th approaches which is World Bipolar Day, it’s also Van Gogh’s birthday who is a well known Dutch impressionist...

Mommy Has A Bug In Her Brain

Trying to explain Bipolar Disorder to a three year old and a five year old was one of the hardest things I have ever done. How was I going to put this into words that they could understand? Telling them that I was in the hospital because I was tired was more...

Getting Past Being Our Community Horror Story

On Presidents’ Day, a school holiday, I awoke to an unscheduled day. I needed something to do with my daughter Marilla, so I decided to take her to the park. (My other little girl, Avonlea, headed for her best friend’s house.) The weather was clear and sunny, but my...

Broad Minded People: Mental Illness in the Philippines

I was having an intellectual conversation with a credit card customer services representative located in the Philippines. I asked her how mental illness was perceived in the Philippines, particularly psychosis. I asked her if there was stigma associated with mental...

First Breakdown

I don’t remember all the details of that night or what inspired the events that were about to take place. I imagine my father and mother had gotten into some kind of tug of war match over me and it was the last straw that broke the camel’s back so to speak. I can...

Waiting For the Other Shoe to Drop

Ever since my bipolar depression lifted last year, I’ve felt I’ve been tumbling around in my dryer. Maybe that’s not the best analogy, but it has been a long, strange, emotional trip! I’ve been holding my breath both literally and figuratively. ...

Breaking the Window on Stigma

Before I knew that I have Bipolar Disorder, I barely knew what it was.  I thought I did, but now I realize I didn’t know much about it at all.  Since being diagnosed I’ve done a great deal of research and study on BPD for a book that I’m writing.  With...

Search for the Strength Deep within

Where is the strength? When did I lose myself in this madness? When I look in the mirror, I only saw sad empty eyes staring back at me. I didn’t recognize who I was anymore. I was afraid of being ME. It was only my reflection, but that’s all I saw, fragments of a...

About Me

About Me

Disclaimer: Any information provided in this blog is based on my own personal experiences and opinions. No information I provide should ever replace the opinions and advice of a professional. I am not a doctor, psychiatrist or affiliated with any Mental Health...

Ok, I’m Bipolar! Now What?

My girls were three and five the first time I was admitted to a psychiatric facility.  I had just crashed from my biggest manic episode and the fallout from my poor decisions had thrown me into a horrible depression.  The year prior to this, I had had a...

Grief

When you lose someone in your life that is close to you, there’s a part of you that dies as well.  As I was entering my 20’s, I knew that there would come a day when my parents weren’t with me anymore.  It still didn’t seem real.  It felt like if I just...

Remembering Those In Mental Health Facilities

Remembering Those In Mental Health Facilities

I am going to touch upon a subject in which I might offend someone I know. I’m willing to take this chance, however, for if I influence anyone who may someday take action if given the chance, I will be thrilled. If someone you know is hospitalized in a...

Birth of a New Brain: Healing from Postpartum Bipolar

After being a fan of the International Bipolar Foundation blogging community, it is an honor to share my perspectives about living with bipolar disorder with you. I wish to help you feel less alone in living with this mood disorder, and to emulate the I.B.F.’s mission...

I Gotta Feeling

Every time I hear “I Gotta Feeling” by Black Eyed Peas ( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uSD4vsh1zDA ) I am instantly energized.  It brings me back to the 2010 Olympics in Vancouver which I was fortunate to go to.  I went to some events and heard this song...

The Give and the Take – Mental Health Group Support

Recently, I went to my first mental health support group meeting. I must admit I was nervous. What would people talk about? What would people think of me? Would I have to talk? If so, what would I say? Though I’ve never been afraid to speak my mind, this was...

Racing, Obsessive & Grandiose Thoughts

I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder eleven years ago. Over the years, I have become familiar with my symptoms and I’m actually good at recognizing them for what they are (which is a good thing) and addressing them. One of the main issues I have always had are my...

Story Tradition

What is it about stories of past episodes in our life. We all love to tell them. The amazing thing is we retell and retell the same stories to our family and friends as if they constituted a fresh audience every time.My in-laws are well into their seventies and,...

Running Bipolar—The Effort to Chase Away Darkness and Manage Mania

I don’t like running. To be honest, I began running out of vanity. My ten year high school reunion was coming up and I refused to look as if I’d just bore two children when I walked through that ballroom door so I started running. Walking just took too...

A Little About Hope

I’m often asked what gave me HOPE through my darkest years and what gets me through rough patches today. There are several key techniques and practices that have helped me throughout the years, and I’m not hesitant to implement them today when I need them. Aside from...

Who am I

Each of us finds strength in our own way. There are many different ways, reasons, places and/or people to get our inspiration from. Sometimes it’s faith, sometimes it’s music. Maybe you find your solace in nature. I find my comfort in my faith. But it hasn’t always...

The Lone Tree- Part 2

Scott Inside Out’s last post about the lone tree (http://www.scottinsideout.com/2013/05/the-lone-tree-part-1/) focused on support. When I look at lone trees I also see that of choosing to live and really fighting for it. Trees that are located in areas with high...

How to Help Your Teenager With Learning Difficulties

We all know that the teen years are difficult. From growing pains to deciding their personal identity, it is easy to say that teens have a lot on their plate. However, teens with learning disorders have that times ten. Most parents notice the struggle happening, but...

The Lone Tree- Part 1

Growing up, I would often notice lone trees by themselves while on roadtrips. I remember asking my parents how the tree survived on its own with no other trees around. And I remember feeling sorry for the tree! Kind of strange, I know, however kids come up with the...

Embracing Bipolar Disorder

Bipolar disorder has been such a shameful and an incredibly misunderstood place for me. Full of false guilt, embarrassment and regret. Confusion, anger and sadness. And plenty of hurt. Until three weeks ago, it’s been my dark little secret for almost eleven years.I...

Keep On Trying

Ten years ago a dear friend of mine gave me a little book during my very first hospital stay called Keep on Trying which is centered around a kitten. I have been reminded of that book in many different ways over the last year through two dear friends. It has inspired...

It Gets Better

 I’ve been thinking a lot about my adolescence lately. This is partly because I’m continuing to delve into my past as I work on my memoir, and partly because both my children are now at ages at which I was battling bipolar pretty much single-handedly. It’s also...

What Mental Health Mean to Me

What Mental Health Mean to Me

Mental Health is hard to pin down. People with depression, anxiety, Bipolar, Schizophrenia, and such aren’t always as open as people with physical illnesses. For one reason, they don’t feel as comfortable talking about their illness because of the...

Blessing of Blind Spots

When a spouse, family member or friend points out something that you said or did wrong that you were not aware of, or a habit that does not serve you well (http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/emotional-fitness/201301/10-tools-change-hurtful-habits), how do you feel?...

Black Eye

Even though I was diagnosed as bipolar in the year 2000, it was something that I felt too embarrassed to talk about until fairly recently. It’s only in the past few years that I’ve been comfortable telling people besides family about my bipolar diagnosis. In my...

Almost at the finish line

I apologize for my lack of posts for the past month. My professors have a tendency to pack all the exams at the beginning of the month and then I lose track of the times I need to submit entries in. On the brighter side, I am four weeks away from graduation.May...

I Petcha I’ll Make You Feel Better

I Petcha I’ll Make You Feel Better

I have four cats. They are like my kids. I wake up every morning and go find each one and kiss them, after of course I kiss my husband! I grew up with dogs, and went through pets that taught responsibility, these were the guinea pigs, rabbits, and fish. Although...

A Mother’s Nightmare

I had been expecting the call. Finally, two and a half weeks ago it came. Not that I wanted it to come, but it didn’t surprise me. Over the last couple years, I’ve expected it. And dreaded it too.When I first heard the news, I was remarkably calm. All...

Mental Illness Stigma: Myth vs. Fact (Article 1 in Stigma series)

The hardest part of living with a mental illness is the stigma that is in the world today. This unfortunate attitude makes living with these health issues so much worse than it needs to be. It creates feelings of shame, inferiority, failure and brokenness for the...

How can you push the boulder today?

Last week I was invited to an event dedicated to human resources and mental health. The audience was composed of professionals with knowledge in the HR and employments law fields; I was invited as an “expert by experience” in the field of mental health. The event was...

My Wish for You

My wish for you today and every day after isTo know your true worthTo value yourselfTo treat yourself like you do othersTo be kind and gentle with yourself because you know you deserve itTo feel peace from your inner painTo know how strong you truly areTo understand...

Worry

Worry

Okay, I admit it. Worrying comes natural for me. In fact I will actually admit that at times I am addicted to worrying. As I progressed from parenthood to grandparenthood my worrying accelerated. When my babies laed cuddled in the warmth of blankets, I worried that...

Friends-A Bipolar Perspective

Although I put family and my beloved spouse in a different place, I was just thinking of all my varied friendships so I thought I would comment on them and show how a bipolar lifestyle works in:Being a good Catholic boy, serving on the altar until eighteen, I looked...

Approaching someone with Bipolar Disorder

I asked for topic suggestions on my Facebook page, and this one that came up. Someone asked, “How do you approach a person with bipolar disorder if you are non-bipolar”. I found this quite interesting. It makes me wonder, why would you approach a person with bipolar...

A Swing in Time

In this new year, I am resolving to track my emotions better…Not because emotions are my enemy or anything like that. Maybe a better word to use is I want to appreciate the subtle changes in my emotions more.This is not a new thought of course, but it came to me...

Flying Home with a Sinking Feeling

I’m so tearful. I’m embarrassed sitting here at the gate waiting for a plane that will take me away.I cannot even begin thinking, much less speaking, about returning to SO MUCH UNCERTAINTY…without eyes brimming and overflowing. People sitting around...

Untreated Mental Illness

An untreated mental illness can be difficult for not only the person who is suffering from the illness but also for the people who come into contact with the person, most commonly the people closest to the person. On the rare occasion a mental illness that a person is...

Words of Encouragement to Jesse Jackson Jr., or To Anyone Struggling With a Diagnosis of Bipolar Disorder

Reading of your recent diagnosis, I was struck by how my story parallels yours in many ways. From the outside, we both appeared to have it all: successful careers, happy marriages, and hopes and dreams for the future. Behind the façade, however, few people grasped how...

My Letter to You

Some of us are so far from what we imagined our lives would be like; Some have exactly what they pictured; Some are trying to do everything they can to escape the constant reminder that we failed to meet our childhood expectations and dreams of adulthood. No matter...

“FINALS! FINALS! GET YOUR FINALS HERE!”

Finals are the dreading exams we take at the end of each semester that not only covers four months worth of material in 50 questions, but covers a large sum of our overall grades. The intense pressure to do well on finals is a nightmare for any college student, but...

How Journaling Changed Bipolar Disorder for Me

How Journaling Changed Bipolar Disorder for Me

In my first post I mentioned that there was a time when my mental health was in rapid decline. It was at this point when I realized that I had to change something before it was too late. But what? And, how? I didn’t know the answers. I needed some information....

If I was Strong Enough to Pull Myself Up, You Can Do it Too!

There was a time when my mental health got to the point I had memory gaps. I was in a rapid decline and aware of it. I had a disabled boyfriend who took care of me, instead of the other way around. I didn’t trust doctors anymore. I knew if I didn’t pull myself up, no...

Journal Keeping, Lists, etc.

Those of us in this war on our disorder, facing each battling day with all the challenges we face can relate to what I’m about to say. Growing up my mom always prompted me to make a list of the things I need to do for each day. My grandmother always encouraged...

You Are Not Alone

Never let another person’s opinion of yourself be your view of yourself. Winston Churchill said, “We are still masters of our fate. We are still captains of our souls.” No one can take that away from you. Don’t be afraid to let your voice be...

Support

This may not hit home with all of you, but it is whats on my mind lately. Often we hear in movies and hospital shows the common line, “science can only come so far, and then there’s God.” I don’t know about the rest of you, but I put a lot of...

Remembering my first time…

I have a hard time truly disclosing to anyone how I am doing on the inside. Mood charts were very vague for me and the more I got used to the typical mood rating conversation, the easier it was to not disclose my thoughts and feelings, especially if I wasn’t directly...

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