Category: Bipolar Disorder

Explore Your Options For Affordable Psychiatric Care

Explore Your Options For Affordable Psychiatric Care

My first instinct when realizing I needed psychiatric help because I was having a breakdown, was to call my company’s EAP (Employee’s Assistance Program). I was lost and they advertised at work that this program could help with many different things, one of them being...

You Are a Rock Star

You Are a Rock Star

Hey! Hey you! Yeah, I’m talking to you over there. The one with bipolar disorder. The one that constantly looks down on themselves and wishes they were someone else. The one that wonders what happened in their life to deserve this wretched beast of an illness. I’m...

What I Didn’t Realise About Being Diagnosed With Bipolar Disorder

What I Didn’t Realise About Being Diagnosed With Bipolar Disorder

Recently I gave a keynote presentation at the Victorian Collaborative Mental Health Nursing Conference in Australia. It was amazing and inspirational to see the great work so many mental health nurses are doing. The title of my keynote was ‘World Changing’. This title...

More Than Meds

More Than Meds

Bipolar disorder is a complex and difficult condition. Even after getting stabilized, we still have to work so hard to keep things going in the right direction. For me, medication is necessary, but the best advice I ever received was from a psychiatrist and it had...

Family History and Bipolar Disorder

Family History and Bipolar Disorder

Greetings all! I am a new blogger here as of this month, and I’m really excited to begin the process of opening up a great door: the door of honest discussion about bipolar disorder. There are so many facets to this condition. I thought I would start off with...

How I Saved My Life

How I Saved My Life

I roll over to the edge of my bed and start searching for my pills: white pill, purple pill and a couple of other pills my psychiatrist said I needed. I’m not ready to get out of bed, but I know I can’t miss another day at work. By the time I’m in...

7 Things I Learned at the Psych Ward

7 Things I Learned at the Psych Ward

Does the title of this blog scare you? Does it make you laugh? Does it make you cry? Make you shudder? It might do one or all of those things. Most people never want to admit they have been to a psychiatric hospital. I can’t say I would have ever dreamed I would...

Words Matter

Words Matter

I am now beginning to realize something that never occurred to me before: I “have” bipolar disorder. If you had asked me a couple of weeks ago, I would have told you that I “am” bipolar. What a difference one word makes. I “have” bipolar. Over my life, I have been...

The 4 Spiritual Traps of Bipolar Disorder

The 4 Spiritual Traps of Bipolar Disorder

I want to start by saying that this list of spiritual traps accompanying bipolar disorder is no scientific article. Rather, it is a list of my own experiences and those of my clients searching for ways to integrate spiritual wisdom gleaned during times of madness...

5 Rules for Facebooking When You Have Bipolar

5 Rules for Facebooking When You Have Bipolar

Although I sometimes wax nostalgic about bygone days when screens did not dominate my life and my attention was not as divided as often as it seems to be lately, the fact is I think a healthy social media community can be a great asset to persons suffering from mental...

Carrying the Weight

Carrying the Weight

Prior to my diagnosis and starting my treatment, I spent countless hours each day stuck in a cycle of worry and panic. I would ruminate, the worst moments of my life and every single mistake I’ve ever made surfacing in my mind and stuck in an infinite replay....

Burnt

Burnt

I have recently experienced a mental health burnout. Normally, when I say that I mean I’m tired of dealing with my own mental health, but not this time. This time I am just jaded regarding the blogging I do. Just over two years ago I went public with my condition on...

Learning to Manage a Manic Mind

Learning to Manage a Manic Mind

If you walked into my house right now, this is what you would see: dishes piling up, laundry in piles waiting to be folded, a dirty floor and me in bed. It’s happening again. I’m having another manic episode. This one, though, is different. Maybe it’s the empty house...

30 Things Not To Say To Those With Bipolar Disorder

30 Things Not To Say To Those With Bipolar Disorder

I always enjoy reading articles about  what not to say and what to say to someone with a mental illness. I read them and nod my head in agreement, as I can relate all too well. There are sayings or comments that may seem helpful, but aren’t in reality because...

Life in the Cycle of Anxiety

Life in the Cycle of Anxiety

Have you ever been so afraid of tripping that you couldn’t take a flight of stairs, even though something like that would never happen? This is the stage setting for my anxiety disorder. I have written about my bipolar disorder a lot of times, but my anxiety...

Meds, Memory Loss and My Support System

Meds, Memory Loss and My Support System

Approximately three years ago I started noticing that something wasn’t quite right. At first it was little things, like putting my glasses in a desk drawer instead of on my nightstand like I normally would. That was just the beginning. It progressed rapidly. Within...

Inside the Mind of Someone with Social Anxiety

Inside the Mind of Someone with Social Anxiety

I have been dealing with social anxiety since around the time I was diagnosed with Bipolar. That’s 8 long years dealing with both Bipolar and social anxiety. I used to keep myself at arms-length from people for fear of being rejected, since my social anxiety causes...

Why You Should Watch “Silver Linings Playbook”

Why You Should Watch “Silver Linings Playbook”

One of my favorite movies is Silver Linings Playbook.  It is the first mainstream movie I’ve ever seen that accurately depicts the specific symptoms that each character has.  It goes into great detail about delusions, manic episodes, depression and all around bipolar...

Some Days, I Want To Get Off The Ride

Some Days, I Want To Get Off The Ride

Some days, I want to get off the ride. Some days, I just want to be “normal.” I don’t want to deal with unpleasant side effects of medications. I don’t want to endure my lows or spiral out of control during my highs. I don’t want to be crazy. I don’t want to fall...

Support For Suicidal Thoughts and Actions

Support For Suicidal Thoughts and Actions

Suicide is a permanent solution to what, with the proper help, could be a short-term situation. It needn’t be permanent. Seek the help and support you need. When I attempted suicide, I caught my support system off guard, including my doctors and psychiatric...

Bipolar Disorder: My Story and My Passions

Bipolar Disorder: My Story and My Passions

Hey guys! If you haven’t noticed, this is excitingly my first blog post for IBPF. I just thought that maybe before jumping into all the big issues, you might want to know a little about me and my relations with bipolar disorder. And I totally understand! Whenever I...

10 Lessons From 10 Years of Living With Bipolar

10 Lessons From 10 Years of Living With Bipolar

I can hardly believe that it has been 10 years since I received a diagnosis of bipolar disorder. I wish I could go back and tell my terrified teenage self that though life would sometimes be a roller coaster of ups and downs, a very bright future full of hope and joy...

Practicing Gratitude and Curiosity With Bipolar

Practicing Gratitude and Curiosity With Bipolar

Coping with the side effects of bipolar is often a matter of trial and error. What works one day, sometimes doesn’t work the next. That’s why I’m always on the lookout for ways to get through the day that can connect me with the world while also...

judgMENTAL (Filipino)

judgMENTAL (Filipino)

This article is available in English here.  “Ginagawa mo namang malaking bagay yang sakit mo sa utak!” “Puro yang sakit mo na lang lagi sinasabi mo. Masyado mong ginagawang glamoroso!” “Hindi mo naman kailangan ng gamot eh. Nasa utak mo lang yan!” “Maging postibo ka...

judgMENTAL

judgMENTAL

Above: mixed media on canvas by Zaeli Eliza “You’re making mental illness as if it’s a big deal!” “You talk too much about it. You’re glamorizing your illness!” “You don’t need medication. It’s all in your head.” “Think positive. Toughen...

Monitoring and Managing Emotions

Monitoring and Managing Emotions

Managing emotions is something that comes along with many mental health diagnoses, especially bipolar disorder. It’s always one emotion or another and every one of them is usually to the extreme. Some of the emotions I deal with include anger, depression,...

The Blahs

The Blahs

Here’s a post I didn’t think I’d ever write! I have been on what is considered to be the best mood stabilizer for over a year, and my mood symptoms have been totally under control. No ups, no downs. I have also been taken off the selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor...

A Q&A for Self-Care Day

A Q&A for Self-Care Day

July 24 is International Self-Care Day. On behalf of International Bipolar Foundation, I asked my friend, Mike, a fitness enthusiast, yogi, plant-based eater and animal lover, to share the benefits of practicing self-care. As a person who lives with bipolar and...

The Soup in My Head

The Soup in My Head

“This drawing is called ‘The Soup in My Head’ and was drawn by my friend Julia. We were having coffee time together and I shared with her my fear of planning something ahead as I often have fozzy, foggy mood, and moodswings, although I take lithium...

The Danger Mental Illness Presents to Indigenous Peoples

The Danger Mental Illness Presents to Indigenous Peoples

I lived in Northwest Arkansas for several years. My little town was just across the Oklahoma state line and the Cherokee Nation, which is the federally-recognized government of the Cherokee people.  We often traveled to Tulsa for shopping and entertainment along the...

An Activist’s Preparation for the Challenges of Bipolar

An Activist’s Preparation for the Challenges of Bipolar

Above: The Revs. Aaron Maurice Saari and John Freeman being interviewed on Martin Luther King Jr. Day in front of First Presbyterian Church of Yellow Springs.  My friends are going to laugh that I have the chutzpah to write an essay on self-care. You see, I am...

There’s Nothing Romantic About Mental Illnesses

There’s Nothing Romantic About Mental Illnesses

We have seen a lot of movies that put the spotlight on mental illness. Movies like “Girl, Interrupted,” “Prozac Nation,” “Rain man,” and very recently “Silver Linings Playbook” and “Infinite Polar Bear,” to...

Bipolar Disorder and the Damage of Addiction

Bipolar Disorder and the Damage of Addiction

Addiction is a disease. It can turn someone strong into a powerless human being. It can make someone a prisoner in their own body. “My name is Laura and I am an addict.” That sentence took me three years to say out loud. I always will be an addict, but I...

Waiting On Meds To Work

Waiting On Meds To Work

Medications can be an excellent form of treatment for bipolar disorder. There are multiple forms of medications including anti-psychotics, anti-depressants, mood stabilizers and anti-anxiety. For me, the most difficult aspect of taking medications is waiting for them...

An Open Letter to Bipolar Disorder

An Open Letter to Bipolar Disorder

Dear Bipolar,  You have been my closest companion over the years. You found me in high school and refused to leave my side. You convinced everyone that I was always low and moody, making me lose friends in the process. You convinced me that I was less of a person...

Baby Steps Towards Progress

Baby Steps Towards Progress

Since learning I have bipolar disorder, I have come to the reluctant realization that progress doesn’t always occur on my timetable. In my mind, I can see how things will be when I’m “all better,” but every time I race towards recovery, I inevitably stumble. It’s like...

Coming Out After 25 Years With Bipolar: Who Am I Anyway?

Coming Out After 25 Years With Bipolar: Who Am I Anyway?

I’m not who I say I am. That’s because my family would prefer I not use my given name. Many of them don’t believe in bipolar disorder. They think my difficulties were created by using street stimulants during my halcyon Hollywood years, struggling to stay slender for...

Riding the Waves of Depression

Riding the Waves of Depression

Depression can swiftly overtake you like the tide rolling in, its current pulling you out to sea. It is like drowning, like suffocating beneath the surface as the world goes on above you. The water muffles sound and slows your movements. There is only darkness below,...

Running Stop Signs

Running Stop Signs

I was driving much too fast. I didn’t see the stop sign. I sailed right through. The stereo was pumping and my hands gripped the wheel. My foot was pushing harder on the accelerator. I came up to a second stop sign and again I saw nothing. I pushed on the pedal to go...

Self-Actualization After Psychosis

Self-Actualization After Psychosis

I hate coincidences. Ever since I’ve recovered from my bipolar psychosis, I’ve had to be wary of coincidences. Psychosis is a very difficult thing to deal with and understand. I’m going to attempt to delve into this very taboo subject because I want people to know...

My Symbol of Hope

My Symbol of Hope

For many months, I have been suffering from suicidal ideations. I was completely honest with my psychiatrist, my family and friends who support me. I told them that it was not something I wanted to act on, but I couldn’t get the thought out of my mind. For more than...

Dealing with the Loneliness of Mental Illness in India

Dealing with the Loneliness of Mental Illness in India

There’s a reason many of us have trouble sharing our personal battles with mental illness. The reason is the label our society has put on mental health; that anyone who visits a mental health specialist is “crazy,” or “insane.” Mental illness is...

Overcoming Fear With Understanding

Overcoming Fear With Understanding

After 11 years of suffering quietly, I resolved to speak out about something most of us decide is a secret to take to their early graves. For years, decades, lifetimes of silence makes the thing nonexistent to the world. The only reason for this silence is the fear of...

My Beacon of Light: Electroconvulsive Therapy

My Beacon of Light: Electroconvulsive Therapy

Two years ago there was one thing above all in the mental health world that made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up, and it was electroconvulsive therapy (ECT). Not the thought of the procedure itself, but the side effects. As a nursing student, I did a...

Learning Through Art and Others

Learning Through Art and Others

Apart from the mental conditions I was diagnosed with and am being treated for, I am a recluse and an introvert by nature. Even so, neither of those make me remorseful nor ashamed. I admit though, whenever I am “comme ci, comme ça,” I still do try to be a...

Divorce: Writing and My Recovery

Divorce: Writing and My Recovery

“I want a divorce.” The sentence I was afraid of was coming finally came from his mouth. It felt like a ton of bricks and an ache in my stomach. I felt like I was in a movie where the camera zooms out and shows you like an ant. Shortly after he moved out, I overdosed...

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