So, the New Year rolls around, and suddenly everyone’s talking about getting healthy. After living through another year of struggling to keep my moods stable, my side-effects manageable and my weight from spiraling, I have had to ask myself what “healthy” means to me...
January… The month of new beginnings and fresh starts. The slate is wiped clean of all past doings and the hope for a better tomorrow is so thick you can slice it right out of the air and serve it for dinner! Then what? When the bloom of change begins to whither...
Every year, instead of making a resolution, one of my good friends chooses a word to live by and grow with in the upcoming year. She inspired me to do the same.. . .Healthy [hel-thee] adjective: in good condition; a state of complete physical, mental, and social...
This is the third article in, what’s turned out to be, a series on How Bipolar Disorder has Been Changed for Me. If you haven’t read the first two they are:1. How Journaling has Changed Bipolar Disorder for Me2. How Food has Changed Bipolar Disorder for MeJournaling...
I’m so tearful. I’m embarrassed sitting here at the gate waiting for a plane that will take me away.I cannot even begin thinking, much less speaking, about returning to SO MUCH UNCERTAINTY…without eyes brimming and overflowing. People sitting around...
While fishing through my old journals and day planners I came across something that I wrote on January 22nd of 2010:Every yin has its yang….literally!I just tested this theory out. I was looking for my coffee mug and was starting to become frustrated. I saw there was...
Everything in my life has always been to the max! I want sauce on my pasta, it’s gonna be sauce, with some pasta. If I’m gonna work out, I’m gonna run five miles in the blazing hot sun. Everything has always been to the utmost extreme and I’ve never been able to...
New Years is a time for a new beginning and a fresh start. It is a time to let go of the pain from our past and focus on today, now, and the future. I have a lot of pain from my past, depression, fear, psychosis, anxiety, emotional eating, and low self-esteem. 2013 is...
We’ve finally made it to the end of the year.First of all, I want to congratulate you for making it through one more year.Glad you are alive.Glad you’ve made it through 2012.Having bipolar disorder… you really don’t know when you will just snap.Snap and just do what...
As a New Year, 2013, is just days away there are two things that immediately pop into my mind. First is reflection of the past year and how I would like next year to be different. Second, it starts raining weight loss commercials on the television. For me, having...
Being bipolar we have a tendency to indulge. We indulge in shopping, adventures, hobbies, friends, worries, cares, causes and even eating out. Sometimes we eat out at very nice places. Often, we just eat anywhere. We swipe that card and then load up on what will...
For me, 2012 has been a year of great success, immense loss, incredible opportunity and continual change. I accomplished things that I once doubted I could, lost people and things that I had expected to have for years to come, was presented with chances to do things...
The Mayans made a prediction about tomorrow 12.21.12. They claim this will be the “end of time”. This is being interpreted as being the end of the world, or perhaps the end of the world as we know it. My question is, is this really a bad thing? Think about...
An untreated mental illness can be difficult for not only the person who is suffering from the illness but also for the people who come into contact with the person, most commonly the people closest to the person. On the rare occasion a mental illness that a person is...
Happy New Year to Everyone! I hope everyone had a good Christmas. If not I hope you made it through. This month we are suppose to talk about Heath. When I think of Health the first thing I think of is of course Mental Health. Probably the first thing to do to be...
On Motherhood”You’re a really good mother. Your son is very lucky to have such an attentive mom.”These words were said to me yesterday by a pediatrician. Because I’ve been sick for most of my son’s life, I feel insecure about the...
I’m going easy on myself in the New Year because it will be the first of many in which I have admitted and will responsibly addressed my disorder. So here’s what I’ve decided to focus on: • TIP: Improve my diet by eating the colors of the rainbow. Remember that...
Six days stuck to my bed resulted in a 4-hour wait for a med-check at Urgent Psychiatric Care (UPC) in downtown Phoenix. I resumed the same idiocy of pretending I was sick instead of admitting I was in a downturn. In my defense, at least it only took 6 days for me to...
Ive been toying with the idea of whether or not I have inner peace. Its elusive when I concentrate on practicing it, and Im beginning to think that pursuit of it isn’t the goal…HAVING it is. There are steps I can take to prepare my mind to accept...
This past year my world was filled with quite a few life altering events. Last January I was put on short-term disability at my job because of my bipolar disorder. While trying to get better, I struggled a lot with the decision of leaving my husband, who was in St....
2012 had been a rough year for me physically and mentally. I was in the hospital for psychiatric evaluation at least four times. I had a couple of endoscopes, a hospitalization for my back and even a couple of back procedures including a radio frequency ablation on my...
A mixed episode my latest road-trip from one pole to the other with road foodFor extra fun these last three days–I’ve been experiencing symptoms of a mixed episode. I am wildly rosy and ready to take charge…and simultaneously weeping uncontrollably....
Reading of your recent diagnosis, I was struck by how my story parallels yours in many ways. From the outside, we both appeared to have it all: successful careers, happy marriages, and hopes and dreams for the future. Behind the façade, however, few people grasped how...
I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder a few months after turning 18 years old in 2003. While that seems so long ago, one would think 10 years is enough time to figure out how to perfectly manage my illness and life. The truth of the matter is, I am still learning and...
Some of us are so far from what we imagined our lives would be like; Some have exactly what they pictured; Some are trying to do everything they can to escape the constant reminder that we failed to meet our childhood expectations and dreams of adulthood. No matter...
As I lay in my bed in the early stages of a cold I cry. For about a year I have been trying to gain the strength to stay awake and be in the mood to go to a club in the United States with my husband, as my husband is new to the states as of February. Now this may seem...
The latest that has been going on with me is the tumultuous depression that has spiked in my life due to our (my husband and myself) living situation. I am thirty-one years old. My husband is twenty-eight. We are living in the basement of my parents’ home. This...
Controlling our Bipolar Disorder is a full time job, even during the good times. We have meds, psychotherapy, and other standard treatments. However, have you considered food as a form of treatment? I’ve discovered there are certain foods that help me keep the...
Finals are the dreading exams we take at the end of each semester that not only covers four months worth of material in 50 questions, but covers a large sum of our overall grades. The intense pressure to do well on finals is a nightmare for any college student, but...
This is the time of year that we become reflective and think about all the reasons why we have become thankful.I know I do it. I see it all over the Internet on Facebook and Twitter. People posting why they are thankful. The Internet by-ways are practically flooded...
Counting sheepChase the thoughtsAnd shutdown my racing mind.Counting the flock just doesn’t stopThose endless thoughts of mine.Enter baa baa black sheepIn a small prescription form.He comes in twos, but I make him fourWhen I crack him always in half,Or grind him up in...
Several weeks ago I saw my psychiatrist and admitted that I had been indulging in activities that I knew were bad for me, because they supported or nurtured my hypomania. My psychiatrist reminded me that I was playing with fire (since for my, hypomania can be a...
Sometimes when I walk the world I wish you knew me.I also wish I knew me too.Only memories plague my mind.But, the memories don’t tell me who I am or whether I ever knew who I was.It’s just blank.I am more than I see.I am stronger than I think.I am more knowledgeable...
Relapse is both a fear and a loitering thought in the minds of many recovering from any illness or disease. I know for me personally, I always feared relapse of my bipolar disorder and my self-injury. The longer I went doing well; the fear joined the loitering thought...
“Don’t you dare, for one second, surround yourself with people who are not aware of the greatness that you are.”- Jo Blackwell-PrestonI knew there was a problem when this quote made me cry.. . .My friends and family knew I was bipolar. They knew...
In my first post I mentioned that there was a time when my mental health was in rapid decline. It was at this point when I realized that I had to change something before it was too late. But what? And, how? I didn’t know the answers. I needed some information....
In my personal experience, I have found that the absolute worst saying that has ever come about in the English language is Ignorance is Bliss. For, truly, what are you really saying about yourself? If you boil that saying down to the essence of what it really...
There was a time when my mental health got to the point I had memory gaps. I was in a rapid decline and aware of it. I had a disabled boyfriend who took care of me, instead of the other way around. I didn’t trust doctors anymore. I knew if I didn’t pull myself up, no...
“No one knows about a swing better than someone who has Bipolar Disorder.Mood swings are the major part of my life. I’m either on my way up. Up. On my way down. Down. Or I’m “stable” waiting and not knowing if my next swing will be up or down.I’ve experienced...
I recently discovered a very important lesson and realization. Unresolved issues can bite you in the butt at any time without any distinct warning. They can cause anywhere from a little hiccup to complete devastation no matter where you are on the recovery trail. This...
Those of us in this war on our disorder, facing each battling day with all the challenges we face can relate to what I’m about to say. Growing up my mom always prompted me to make a list of the things I need to do for each day. My grandmother always encouraged...
An average of ten million viewers tune into Grey’s Anatomy a week, and in a recent episode we saw a glimpse into what the producers and writers of this acclaimed series think about inpatient psych treatment.Grey’s Anatomy Season 9 Episode 2:“I said no more damn...
My usual reaction when I hear that a film or a book has a bipolar character is to cringe. Bipolar is a condition that evokes interest, sometimes rather prurient interest, in others and I’m very much aware how much public attitudes towards bipolar are shaped by the...
Never let another person’s opinion of yourself be your view of yourself. Winston Churchill said, “We are still masters of our fate. We are still captains of our souls.” No one can take that away from you. Don’t be afraid to let your voice be...
Bipolar’s an interesting diagnosis. It’s sometimes seen as enviably “cool” or “sexy” by people with more run of the mill diagnoses such as depression or anxiety. It’s serious, yet it’s nowhere near as stigmatising a diagnosis to receive as, say, schizophrenia. This is...
This may not hit home with all of you, but it is whats on my mind lately. Often we hear in movies and hospital shows the common line, “science can only come so far, and then there’s God.” I don’t know about the rest of you, but I put a lot of...
Sometimes you’re not depressed, you’re just not happy. And given the world we live in with stress, and the realities of the plot of our lives, it’s hard to decipher the difference between chemical depression and self-inflicted depression.How do you know if you are...
I have Bipolar Disorder, Social Anxiety Disorder, Depression, Panic Disorder, General Anxiety Disorder, PTSD, and a slew of other medical issues not related to psychology. However, I have become concerned about developing Alzheimers disease or Dementia as I grow...
I used to believe in the saying “you can’t really love someone until you love yourself”. I used to also believe in the idea “coping skills are productive if they help you deal with a life situation”. Well, at age 27, I can definitely say I don’t believe in either...
I have a hard time truly disclosing to anyone how I am doing on the inside. Mood charts were very vague for me and the more I got used to the typical mood rating conversation, the easier it was to not disclose my thoughts and feelings, especially if I wasn’t directly...
