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For most of my life I made it possible for myself to pay attention to what was happening in front of me but also be in this well designed, heavenly, whirl-wind sort of fantasy world that I had created to save me from myself. Of course I did not realize this until recently but I think it is important to write about the unimaginable because these...

When Others Don't Seem To Care

February 19, 2015
“YOU DON’T CARE!” I shouted this at my mother the other day… and it was hurtful on so many levels. Because when I calmed down and thought about it, she DID care… in many other ways. In the vein of Gary Chapman’s Five Love Languages, I want to thank my mum for loving me in these ways: -TIME: She took time from her busy schedule...

Reschedule Your Worries

February 18, 2015
Are you worried?  Thinking about a loved one or trouble at work? Worried about something you are in charge of or a relationship problem? Have you ever considered "rescheduling" your worry? Can you give yourself 5 minutes to worry about it today then open up your calendar and reschedule a "worry time" a day or a week from now? Example: I...

You Are My Reason

February 17, 2015
Good evening readers, what a cold frigid night were having. But I’m thankful I am inside where it’s nice and warm. Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day and it’s a celebration of love, but it shouldn’t just be on this special day, but every day, we experience love in some form, whether it’s love between husband  and wife, between boyfriend and...

Group Therapy Provides Hope

February 12, 2015
I recently joined a bipolar support group. My doctor and therapist have been encouraging me for months to join the group. They believed it would help me "normalize" some of my feelings by being around others who might have the same experiences. I put off going to the group because 1) I was either too sick (manic or depressed) to feel like...

La Bipolaridad y el HIV

February 12, 2015
Tratar este tema es un poco delicado ya que estamos hablando  de dos condiciones de salud que en América Latina no se habla mucho en Publico y mucho menos se trata abiertamente por todas las personas involucradas en estos temas. Para comenzar deseo dar una pequeña introducción sobre el HIV este es un Virus que fue descubierto en los...

Abandonment and Rejection

February 11, 2015
I woke up one day in 2011 in a 50 feet by 50 feet room lying on a mattress on the floor. One week had elapsed since I was consciously aware of where I was. My phone had gone off and I had not shown up for work or called any of my family members in a week. The only sign of what could have happened in that week was an empty bottle of vodka right...
In a previous blog, I referred to my Bipolar and PTSD as my dragon, something only I can tame and ride. When you are labeled with a mental illness, the stigma associated with it can become debilitating.  It is as if you somehow become weaker by association, somehow less of a responsible, independent adult. I found that all those...

Why Recovery is Possible

February 10, 2015
I recently read an article written by a person who is tired of people like me talking about recovery from psychiatric disorders.  She wanted us to “stop talking about recovery and start using a more useful and less stigmatizing word: hope.”  I am not sure what she wants us to have hope of.  Stabilization?  Maintenance?  ...

Everyday Hero

February 5, 2015
I’ve noticed that after I wrote my last post about why I’m grateful about being on the psych ward some opinions were unflattering. I understand that for some people it may have looked like those three weeks of hospitalization were three weeks of holiday. Not for me unfortunately. I’m the only one who knows how bad things were at that time....