Our Blog
I am a Doer
I am a doer. I dont like to sit around and watch things get done. I like to jump in with both feet and try my hardest to help out. This gets me in trouble sometimes as I end up with too much on my plate, but its just the way I am.Three years ago when I was diagnosed...
Profundity Is Not On Today’s Menu
I had great aspirations to write a high-quality bipolar-themed blog post last weekend. I envisioned typing a few paragraphs filled with a pearl of wisdom or two that Ive learned since I started recovering from bipolar depression.It ain't gonna happen....
Resilience
I at first didn't even know how to spell the word, let alone understand the proper definition of it. But today, well today I made huge strides into my recovery. You see, the past two days have been rather rocky. No real particular reason why, perhaps too much caffeine...
Importance of Hospitalization
I hope my readers are taking it day by day. Remember don’t ever let the light inside of you dim. This month’s topic I’m going to address is ”Why hospitalization is so important and what important and positive role does it play in a person’s...
Glove
When I was five years old, my father suffered a bipolar breakdown and was sent to a psychiatric institution. It started him on a long descent from top IBM salesman to homeless on the streets of Brooklyn some 20 years later. Our relationship followed a similar...
Removing Obstacles: An Overview
Last month I gave a webinar for International Bipolar Foundation (IBPF) entitled Removing Obstacles: A Naturopathic Perspective on Treatment. In that webinar I discussed the philosophy and therapeutic order of naturopathic medicine and gave some examples related...
Mental Health Hero
During this years Mental Health Awareness month I was thrilled to be selected as a 2014 Mental Health Hero associated with PsychCentrals popular Mental Health Humor column! I was chosen for this honor by advocate/cartoonist/Psych Central columnist Chato...
Therapy: How to get the most out of it
Is this your first appointment with a new therapist? If this is the case, it will take a while for you to get to know the therapist and their style, as well as for them to get to know you. Therapy is useless if theres not positive energy both ways. Evaluate...
More than a Label
I have found one of the most difficult aspects of having a mental illness and specifically bipolar disorder, is realizing we are much more than a diagnosis. In fact, buying into the whole idea of “I am bipolar” instead of believing “I have bipolar,” in my...
LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL
As I was sipping a hot cup of tea in a breezy evening, for the first time, I could feel the calmness in my soul as the wind touched my face. For so long, I had been struggling to feel this way. I had never felt this way. What was this calmness? I wondered. It was as...
A new mattress
This Monday I cried tears of joy for the first time in many years. Probably since my diagnosis, thirteen years ago. I didn’t even cry at my wedding, and my husband is everything to me. So what made me weep openly with happiness? A new...
I Have Bipolar Disorder
My name is Doreen. My psychiatrist says I have bipolar disorder. Some people say I don't have bipolar disorder. Sometimes I believe them.I have had one full psychotic break, one manic episode with milder psychotic symptoms, and one short-lived manic episode....
Medicating While Pregnant
Over at PsychCentral, I've been running a series on postpartum depression and having bipolar while pregnant. I think it's important to reach out to mother's who are struggling with the decision of what to do while they are pregnant or if they are considering...
The Power of One Pill
Pills. Ah, pills. Pill is such an innocuous-sounding word, but anyone with bipolar disorder who takes medication knows that pills are anything but harmless. However, unless you depend on medications to keep you stable, and unless you've experienced...
My Bipolar Isn’t Severe Enough
When I got into advocacy work, public speaking, and blogging, I knew there would be people who disagreed with me and even disliked me altogether. I am familiar with pop culture references to “haters” and I know the comment section can be a difficult place to get...
Against the Odds
When I was in the beginning stages of being diagnosed bipolar most people wrote me off. They thought this girl’s out of school, she can’t keep a job and she certainly cannot contribute to society. I was a self-fulfilling prophecy in a sense I thought I was worthless...
THE FURRY ANTIDEPRESSANT
As of this writing, I will be welcoming a puppy into our home tonight. Our family is totally freaking out about our new addition in the best way possible! And now more than ever, I believe in "furry antidepressants". Please allow me to explain In...
The Importance of Placement in a Crisis
A couple of months ago I read a very enlightening article in my city's newspaper. This article caught my attention right away because of the title; it literally jumped off the page at me, "We need Taunton State Hospital." The woman...
CRAZY
Were never gonna survive, unless, we get a little crazy Seal, CrazyI used to love listening to Seal sing Crazy on my VW Jettas stereo while driving up and down San Franciscos steep hills, a fitting backdrop for such a song. One must drive differently in...
Bipolar Has Been A Blessing
I know many of you are scratching your heads and wondering if someone sane could actually make such a statement. But in my eyes, bipolar has been a blessing in many ways. I have learned a lot about myself and how to manage this illness well enough to be an author, a...
The Journey from Despair to Aware
May is Mental Health Awareness Month. It got me thinking about when I was first aware of my own mental illness.For me, it came on gradually. As a middle school kid, I battled waves of sadness. It didn't help that I was bullied mercilessly. As I got older, the bullying...
Relationships
Relationships are a difficult thing to navigate, especially when you suffer from depression. If you are one of the fortunate people that has found perhaps a handful of people that understand your pain, your mood swings, and your sadness, consider yourself...
It’s My Birthday
Its my birthday. Im 37 today. I have lived with the diagnosis of bipolar disorder for eight years. In that time, literally almost every permutation of the disease has been applied to my particular state. Early-onset but undiagnosed. ...
New Phone?
While my blog started out as a place to vent and rave I have discovered that by just regurgitating my daily events I am no longer getting much out of it. As a result I have decided to change my blog into a more 'self-help' place where I can share my thoughts about a...
That’s Not Bipolar
In my role as a mental illness speaker and blogger, I receive a lot of comments and questions. The one item that stands out is that there is a lot of confusion over what bipolar disorder is and what it isnt.Many folks believe that bipolar disorder is just a more...
Black Box To Bash or Not to Bash?
Last week while on Facebook I spotted an International Bipolar Foundation post about the new ABC television series Black Box premiering Thursday, which features a doctor living with bipolar disorder. ABCs Black Box overview is:The twenty-first...
Co-existing Disease
As you may have noticed I haven’t been keeping up with my blog. Unfortunately I’ve been dealing with multiple hospitalizations for my bipolar disorder as well as my eating disorder. I was at John Hopkins from June-September 2013, and was at the Princeton Eating...
Stigma from the Source
"Stigma = a mark of disgrace or infamy; a stain or reproach, as on one's reputation"I was diagnosed with postpartum bipolar disorder in October of 2007, six weeks after the birth of my second daughter. I was thirty-seven-years-old when I admitted myself into a...
Medication Adjustments and Withdraws
I’m so happy it’s the middle of the week already! Nothing major or stressful has happened, but I’m looking forward to the kiddos having a three day weekend. No stress in getting everyone around in the morning for three days will be nice. Believe me, I’m happy I don’t...
The rainbow after the storm: This Is My Brave
As I sit in my parked car outside the grocery store where I just grabbed a cup of Starbucks to fuel my writing, the rain pounds my windshield, coming down in sheets with such force the car is shaking. It’s the kind of rain where it blurs the driver’s view of the road,...
Freaked to Meet with my PDOC
I never knew what "pdoc" meant until I was diagnosed with bipolar one disorder, and learned that it's a shorthand term used for psychiatrists by those in the bipolar community.My pdoc is wonderful. Out of the myriad of doctors I've seen for bipolar disorder,...
I’m not Just Surviving, I’m living with Hope
Good afternoon readers, I hope this entry finds you fighting to keep going. Because I truly believe with all my heart every precious life has such Value in this world, and I want to offer you as much encouragement as I...
Six and a half year itch – Part Three
This is the third blog in a series about a recent psychiatric hospital stay that I had in December of 2013. To read the first post click here. On the second day of my hospital stay last December, I had a big realization. I was not on ANY...
End of the Day
For the past twenty years I've been a closet songwriter. During my first year attending the University of California at Santa Cruz, I was a regular at open mike night and I belonged to my schools Concert Choir. Our final concert was an exotic piece sung in the...
I Need To Hold It Together
Recently my seven year old was rushed to the emergency room. In the past two weeks this kid has been poked with needles, had ultrasounds done, been seen by numerous doctors, and is scheduled for more tests to figure out what has caused her medical issues and how...
As a Bipolar Mom
As a bipolar Mom, I truly believe that parents that are coping with bipolar disorder have an extra obstacle that they must overcome at times. They must learn how to manage their own illness when they are symptomatic and still be effective parents. I think for most of...
Dogs: Your Baby, Psychiatrist, & Friend
Here’s a photo of my dog, Maggie. She’s one years old. I love her like she’s my baby. I can’t begin to tell you how much she has helped me and my Bipolar Disorder. One day last summer, the local weatherman said we were in the “dog days of summer”....
Sleep that Knits
Sleep that knits up the raveled sleeve of care gimme some!I've always loved the very sound of the famous Shakespearean line from Macbeth:"Sleep that knits up the raveled sleeve of care."Although I have a degree in English literature and I...
Relief & Denial – My First Two Steps
At the age of 16, I was in a serious car accident and suffered a concussion. Within two weeks after the accident, something about me was different.Step 1: ReliefAt the age of 27, during my first psychiatric hospitalization, I was diagnosed with Bipolar...
GO AHEAD; EVERYBODY ELSE DOES!
We probably all feel this way at times. Hopefully you will not mind too much that this is another self-portrait. Now, if I could just figure out which bird I am today... This is another painting from my series entitled "Bipolar Too" It's my goal...
Point of Acceptance
I'm just going to babble here! For most of you that have read my blog posts you know I'm good at that!The last 2 years have been a battle for me and in the end, when I look at the big picture of it all I almost lost that battle. I almost gave in and gave myself up to...
Our Brains Are Tougher Than We Think
Recently I struggled with writer’s block. I really wanted to have the satisfaction of writing something meaningful, though, so I sat down and fumbled in front of my computer. Facebook was calling my name, but I told it to buzz off! I...
Awareness through the Eyes of Van Gogh
We all know the importance of mental health awareness, and doing our part of erasing the stigma that still surrounds Disorders like Bipolar. As March 30th approaches which is World Bipolar Day, its also Van Goghs birthday who is a well known Dutch impressionist...
Mommy Has A Bug In Her Brain
Trying to explain Bipolar Disorder to a three year old and a five year old was one of the hardest things I have ever done. How was I going to put this into words that they could understand? Telling them that I was in the hospital because I was tired was more...
Getting Past Being Our Community Horror Story
On Presidents’ Day, a school holiday, I awoke to an unscheduled day. I needed something to do with my daughter Marilla, so I decided to take her to the park. (My other little girl, Avonlea, headed for her best friend’s house.) The weather was clear and sunny, but my...
World Bipolar Day- CALL TO ACTION
World Bipolar Day - an initiative of the Asian Network of Bipolar Disorder, the International Bipolar Foundation, and the International Society for Bipolar Disorders - will be celebrated each year on March 30th, the birthday of Vincent Van Gogh, who was posthumously...
Broad Minded People: Mental Illness in the Philippines
I was having an intellectual conversation with a credit card customer services representative located in the Philippines. I asked her how mental illness was perceived in the Philippines, particularly psychosis. I asked her if there was stigma associated with mental...
First Breakdown
I don’t remember all the details of that night or what inspired the events that were about to take place. I imagine my father and mother had gotten into some kind of tug of war match over me and it was the last straw that broke the camel’s back so to speak. I can...
Waiting For the Other Shoe to Drop
Ever since my bipolar depression lifted last year, I've felt I've been tumbling around in my dryer. Maybe that's not the best analogy, but it has been a long, strange, emotional trip! Ive been holding my breath both literally and figuratively. Ive always been...
Breaking the Window on Stigma
Before I knew that I have Bipolar Disorder, I barely knew what it was. I thought I did, but now I realize I didn’t know much about it at all. Since being diagnosed I’ve done a great deal of research and study on BPD for a book that I’m writing. With...
Search for the Strength Deep within
Where is the strength? When did I lose myself in this madness? When I look in the mirror, I only saw sad empty eyes staring back at me. I didn’t recognize who I was anymore. I was afraid of being ME. It was only my reflection, but that’s all I saw, fragments of a...
About Me
Disclaimer: Any information provided in this blog is based on my own personal experiences and opinions. No information I provide should ever replace the opinions and advice of a professional. I am not a doctor, psychiatrist or affiliated with any Mental Health...
Loving Someone With Bipolar Disorder
I’ll be the first to admit that loving someone with bipolar disorder is not easy. My husband will be the second person to tell you this. We’ve certainly had our share of major ups and downs, but we’ve managed to make it through the past eight and a half years of my...
Good-bye Medication, Hello Withdrawal
I have Bipolar II. Usually, I am well managed by a combination of medications and counseling. I do not usually battle extremes because usually my meds work. But not today.Today, electricity pulses just underneath my skin, racing from my fingertips to my toes and back...
Are You Shocked That I Got Shocked?
The Content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard...
Ok, I’m Bipolar! Now What?
My girls were three and five the first time I was admitted to a psychiatric facility. I had just crashed from my biggest manic episode and the fallout from my poor decisions had thrown me into a horrible depression. The year prior to this, I had had a...
Feeling Honored
Three years ago when I started this blog, my intent was to help as many bipolar parents as I possibly could. I wanted to share my experiences and feelings in hopes that others may be able to use what I am going through to feel less alone and be able to cope just a...
World Bipolar Day History
World Bipolar Day (WBD) celebrated its inaugural year on March 30th, 2014 the birthday of Vincent Van Gogh, who was posthumously diagnosed as probably having bipolar disorder. The vision of WBD is to bring world awareness to bipolar disorders and eliminate...
I am bipolar, I am blessed with it, and get-it-over-with-itis
First of all, before I take off with my diatribe, if you happen to have bipolar and you use the wording I'm about to discuss, please do not take offense. That is the very last thing I want to do in this blog. I merely wish to play devil's...
Grief
When you lose someone in your life that is close to you, there’s a part of you that dies as well. As I was entering my 20’s, I knew that there would come a day when my parents weren’t with me anymore. It still didn’t seem real. It felt like if I just...
Who Can Have Mental Illness?
Ever wonder if mental illness affects some groups of people more than others? Why do I have Bipolar Disorder, and my friends do not? Did I do something to cause it to happen? Was there something I could have done to avoid it? Maybe it’s totally the fault of...
EVERYBODY KNOWS ONE
And sometimes it’s me! Anyone who is around me when I’m in a mania knows that I’m loud, speak rapidly and make sure that everyone knows that I’m the expert on any subject that comes up. My wife thinks that the resemblance is...
EVERYBODY KNOWS ONE
And sometimes it’s me! Anyone who is around me when I’m in a mania knows that I’m loud, speak rapidly and make sure that everyone knows that I’m the expert on any subject that comes up. My wife thinks that the resemblance is remarkable…. ...
Remembering Those In Mental Health Facilities
I am going to touch upon a subject in which I might offend someone I know. I’m willing to take this chance, however, for if I influence anyone who may someday take action if given the chance, I will be thrilled. If someone you know is hospitalized in a...
Why Do I Fast?
When you hear or read the word fast (in relation to food), what immediately comes to mind? If you had mentioned the word fasting to me a couple of years ago, I would have instantly thought of one or more days without food and/or water. The word fasting...
Which Came First
We often hear people speak of the “chicken or the egg” theory. Which came first? The same can be asked of which comes first in people that are both overweight and depressed. Which came first? I know that I was overweight as a child. Was I...
Refused Treatment
It’s very frustrating when you can’t get medical attention because of the medication you are on. Here… Let me explain. Over the weekend I moved from my three bedroom house into a two bedroom apartment. There was a lot of sorting, packing, lifting,...
Six and a half year itch- Part One
On Wednesday, December 11 of 2013 I ended up somewhere I never thought Id be again...in a psychiatric hospital unit room in Calgary, Alberta, Canada. After having a manic episode. It was also the exact same unit that I was in during my last manic episode...
Valentine, Heart Break Time
Doris was the prettiest woman among my friends. She was the kind of girl who always made people stop breathing when they first met her. She is the kind of girl who always gets the boy, be it the soccer team captain in Hong Kong or the football star in the states. She...
Happy New Year
Every New Year people become rather obsessed it seems with making new years resolutions. Many seem to think it is natural to suddenly make long and unobtainable lists of the things they ‘should’ or ‘must’ be doing. ‘I should be slim’ is followed by hopeless looks...
Tag A Friend Who Has This Mental Disability
By Su Bin Cho In just four hours, this Facebook post received 110 thousand likes. I saw the same post copied and pasted onto many other pages appear in my newsfeed because so many of my fellow Korean friends were tagging each other in the comments. It read: “These...
2014 1st Place Essay Winner
By Eric Shan Last month, I was fortunate enough to have been able to interview Kevin Breel, a comic who travels across the US to share his story about struggling with mental illness. One of the most vexing things he said that night of his performance was in response...
Bipolar Too
Middle of the Road Rapid Cycling War & PeaceMy name is Roger and I suffer from Bipolar Disorder 2. This blog almost did not get written. I informed Ashley at the International...
Birth of a New Brain: Healing from Postpartum Bipolar
After being a fan of the International Bipolar Foundation blogging community, it is an honor to share my perspectives about living with bipolar disorder with you. I wish to help you feel less alone in living with this mood disorder, and to emulate the I.B.F.’s mission...
Child Free
As far back as I can remember, we have always been fed the same philosophy about life. You grow up, go to college, meet the man (or woman) of your dreams, get married, move into a big house with a white picket fence, and have a whole gaggle of kids. That’s...
I Gotta Feeling
Every time I hear I Gotta Feeling by Black Eyed Peas ( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uSD4vsh1zDA ) I am instantly energized. It brings me back to the 2010 Olympics in Vancouver which I was fortunate to go to. I went to some events and heard this song...
An audience with Kay Redfield Jamison
Last week I attended a talk at the Wellcome Collection. For non-Londoners, the Collection houses the phenomenal range of medical objects gathered from around the world by Sir Henry Wellcome in the late 19th and early 20th century. It also plays host to relevant events...
Splitting the Holidays
When you go through a divorce it is inevitable that you will split everything. That includes time with your children if you have them. Every other weekend isn’t that bad. It was in the beginning. Believe me, it took a while for me to get used...
Bittersweet Holiday Treats: How Sugar affects your Mood
I dont know about you, but this time of year is always tough for me. I am sure many of you can relate to a seasonal pattern for highs and lows bright, sunny, energetic spring and summer almost always brings about the same in me, and so why wouldn't dull, dreary...
What Do You Have to Say?
As a writing teacher, I often get the question, What should I write about? My response is always, Write about having nothing to write about. Believe it or not, most of the time, these students end up with something they actually wanted to say and just couldn't get...
When We Get Bad News: Seeking the Opportunity — Slaying the Tragedy
Having Bipolar Disorder is hard enough. From day to day, from moment to moment, we are always adjusting, monitoring. Am I getting manic? Is this depression creeping in? Should I talk to my doctor about a medication change? We are constantly trying to find that perfect...
Honesty
Being Bipolar and trying to lead a normal life has a lot to do with honesty. I have to try very hard sometimes to come across as a regular person, but as long as I follow a few simple rules, I find I can accomplish it, and then once I break down some of the barriers...
Pets and Bipolar Disorder
Do you have pets? I do. I have two. One is a feisty little lovebird with a big attitude. His name is Chicklet. This picture is of my other pet. Her name is Maggie. She is my 8 month old puppy. I got her when she was 14 weeks old. She’s wonderful, cute, the new love of...
Stigma Stops Here
I was having a smoothie with a good friend from high school. She found me on facebook. I have not seen her since I graduated in 1998. We decided to get together at a coffee shop to have smoothies. Her name is Janet and she works at Shurr High school in Montebello. She...
A Healthier You: Mental Illness, Medication, and Weight loss
I had given up that I would ever be a size 7 again. I was more like a size 16 and 18. I had gained 60lbs as a side of effect of medication. Well, it did increase my appetite and given that Im an emotional eater, I solely blamed my weight gain problems on medication....
Dear Dr Third Eye aka Dr I don’t want your drama!
Dear Dr Third Eye aka Dr I don’t want your drama!Albert Einstein once remarked that ‘insanity was doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results’. I have often thought of the aptness of this quote, as I perpetually visited psychiatrists. The...
Can Bipolar be Eliminated?
I often have wondered to myself about the possibility of Bipolar Disorder being eliminated, cured, completely dealt with and stricken from the record. After living with the illness for most of my 41 years I have little faith this will happen in my lifetime, but it...
What’s it like to be a rapid cycler?
I will attempt to try to describe it the best way I can. When I am cycling and in a low mood, I become angry as it appears to arrive out of nowhere. One moment I am feeling fine, then boom without any warning it rears its ugly head. I imagine it as a super villain who...
Please welcome our new blogger, Christine!
Christine resides in Houston, Texas where she was born and raised. She is employed full time as a Senior Human Resource representative and has worked at the same company for 13 years. She was an accountant for most of her career, but decided she needed a change of...
One Step Forward; Two Steps Back
This year has been particularly difficult for me. When depression hit, it hit hard. When it rains, it pours ? as they say. Right as I thought I was pulling myself through, I hit rock bottom. With sinus infections and chronic migraines all year, it's no wonder that...
My Journey
It has taken me a long time to get where I am. It has been 34 years if you take into account my whole life, 18 if you start from my first venture into the world of psychiatry. More than half my life, just to be here. But here is a great place and was worth the...
Suicide Awareness Day
DISCLOSURESTOP and read the following clearly. This article may be troubling to somebody thinking about suicide. This article is about personal and factual experiences regarding suicide. Please do not read if you are in a dark place and feeling suicidal. Suicide...
Can I Advocate from the Shadows or Is That Hypocrisy?
As some of you may know, my 21 year old bipolar son was incarcerated last March during a manic episode where he did something that was, in his words very stupid. He was in the midst of denying his illness and he was running with the wrong crowd, and self-medicating...
Sometimes it seems like I am the only one fighting for my child
My daughter is 11 yrs old. We’ll call her Bug. Bug was diagnosed bipolar when she was 7. It has been a long, difficult road of ups and downs since then. We went through three schools before anyone would listen to me enough to give her an I.E.P. Finally at the end of...
Once upon a Dream
‘Waking up is hard to do’I have always had a rather constant, endless even array of dreams. Whereas as some people have the odd dream now and again or some confess to never dreaming, I have always had dreams that are complex, graphic in their imagery and...
NORMAL—A look at Darren Stein’s Art Work
This week I wanted to highlight an artist who both creates art and has been diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder. While searching the Internet I came across Darren Stein, an Australian artist and poet. Although Stein was previously diagnosed with Post-Traumatic Stress...
I Look In The Mirror
Every morning I wake up and I look in the mirrorSometimes I know who I see and that is meOther times it is a stranger staring back at me.Where did the years go?When did my life become medication, therapy, support groups, and doctor’s appointments?Will I ever be who I...
The Give and the Take – Mental Health Group Support
Recently, I went to my first mental health support group meeting. I must admit I was nervous. What would people talk about? What would people think of me? Would I have to talk? If so, what would I say? Though I've never been afraid to speak my mind, this was...
What is Medicare?
This is one of the hardest blog topics thus far. This topic of Medicare is so complicated and this topic could go on forever. I have summarized the information that I feel will help others understand the in’s and out’s of Medicare, which is very difficult for those in...
Remission – Is it a Good Thing?
I think one of the less talked about aspects of Bipolar Disorder is what happens when one is stable. I mean we hear lots about both the depression side and the mania/hypomania side. But ,what about life as a stable person? Some call it remission. No depression and no...
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Check Out Pilar’s Corner!
Sharing lessons from personal experiences, time-saving tips, and helpful strategies to support you or your caregiver and navigate a bipolar diagnosis.
Check Out General Gregg’s Corner!
Hear from Major General Gregg Martin about his battle with bipolar disorder, and learn more about how you can support service members & veterans mental health.